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That's Right...I'm White
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changes...
IP: 16C2 A3E7
apparently i've changed, not who i used to be,
i'm different in many ways, so my friends say to me but i don't understand, i feel the same as before i guess i dyed my hair, it ain't brown no more does that really change who i am? cause if it does, damn, i'm in a jam... maybe i had enough of bein treated like a kid for fuck sakes, i'm eighteen i ain't stupid i'm an adult now, every man for himself i don't care if i have friends, i can take care of myself so who am i spose to be, when i can't be me man my mind is lost, wish i had the key fuck it, i'll be who i wannabe if ya don't like it, y'all can bite me people go through changes, what can ya do just be here for me, and i'll be there for you we all go through changes...good or bad ya gotta do it life blows sometimes, just the way it is in this shit..... uppin |
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Tampons are expensive
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IP: EF0A E7B2
Shiznit's Thoughts:
There's nothing more greater than being yourself. The whole idea of "People Change" are quite true but yet for some reason you cant get seem to admit and reflect on the times that you had to go through to get to where you are. The I-dont-give-a-fuck-what-you-think attitude changes overtime. Sometimes changes are good sometimes they are bad. Just think of what the changes bring to ur life and stick to the ones that affect you the most in a good way. This piece is yet self explanatory. It was nice knowing that you wanna be yourself and not live through lives of others. Week VI is up in Rhetorical Insights. Wouldnt hurt if you drop one. Thanks.
__________________
<br><br><center>- Shiznit - - Tampons are still expensive - - That's a Fact - </center> |
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That's Right...I'm White
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IP: A0D2 5C87
yeh, change happens, and yeh just gotta deal with it,
keep uppin guys, peace |
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-Merk Squad-
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IP: 9B91 D0C6
People Dont Change Opinion's do...
I liked it, the verse wasnt poetically brilliant, But the message sunk in very nice, keep this shit goin.. PZ.... Werd To Shiz Rhetorical Insights Week VI Is up!!!! |
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That's Right...I'm White
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IP: 4600 51E6
good point,
uppin |
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Guest
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IP: 9B33 081B
Quote:
^i agree. the message is the most important thing in poetry and however you get your point across is what makes a poem good/bad. this is well done not because of structure or complex rhyme schemes but simple emotion clearly stated. 1 |
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Guest
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IP: 64A5 FF18
Without focusing too much on how you structured the piece. You seeemed to get right into your own emotions and thoughts with a bare simplicity. And to good effect. It did seem a bit like a slightly controlled vent. Like you just sat down, with this playing on your mind. And you just typed it out...
...resp... |
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The sYcKlE Makes Me Do It
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IP: 579F F01D
This was dope
I agree with Shiz and Varento Some whaT simplistic but good visual Slightly controlled yet full of Anger Dope |
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Registered User
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IP: 8197 FA9C
well written piece... the topic has a great message, just be who you wanna be and just feel comfortable with being yourself.
You could elevate on vocab and wordplay though, ...no hard feelings intended. The message came across and at the end of the day that's the most important. Keep dropping, it was a nice read. keep living life in the way you wonna live it peace |
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