This is a sorry to my girl...
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I'm sorry for the things i did, I'm sorry for what i said ~
I'm sorry for the time i told you that i wished you were dead ~

I'm Sorry

I'm sorry for who i am, and sorry for who i be ~
I'm sorry for not telling you how much you mean to me ~

I'm Sorry

I'm sorry for the way i treated you, I'm sorry for the way i spoke ~
I'm sorry for the way i laughed at you and told you to choke ~

I'm Sorry

I'm Sorry for all the hurt, I'm sorry for what i've put you through ~
I'm sorry that this is the first time that i've said "I love you" ~

I'm Sorry

I'm sorry for all the wrong, I'm sorry for all the pain ~
I'm sorry for the time that i even forgot your name ~

I'm sorry

I'm sorry baby i love you, I'm sorry i haven't said it yet ~
I'm sorry but i'm scared of being hurt and making a regret ~

I'm Sorry
I Love you...
I'm sorry

this here wasnt that great, but its good for the purpose why you made it, im not one for the whole repeating thing that just turns me off. there was one line thou that i gotta point out

I'm sorry for who i am, and sorry for who i be

dont EVER be sorry for who you are, because if you try to change who you are all together you wont be you, then yu should be sorry for selling them a fake, someone your not

anywho not much else to say hope she takes your apoligie LOVE

~Tera~
DONT HATE

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dats sum fuqq'd up shit................i've been through shit like dat..........see gurls r very beautiful lil things........so i feel ur ish.....but if she don't apologize den go on wit ya life dawg.....thurrs lots of otha beautiful mami's out thurr....

i don't understand sing'n a poem....beautiful lil thang don't wanna come home//
tell her peace and good-bye....den through flowers and leave a bird ova her stone//
sum jus wanna b left alone.....we r young dawgs, not yet fully grown//
let her think fo a while.....she got yo numba?? couple days lata it'll b her on da phone//

whateva.......1ne.....

as a rap that could've been some deep shit but as a poem, i didn't feel tha meaning u were tryin to get off, i understood u know tha whole sorry thing but tha lines u made didn't have that edge that a poem has, it seemed as if it was a "The Raven" or another poem that has a sentiment but sadistic reality to it, i felt u had anger at tha same time that u had sorrow which is good for a poem but it really didn't go well wit tha topic of tha poem, if anything, it could've been betta if u would've said u were sorry for a lot of straight out things and said u were sorry for like lookin at other girls, or not thinking about her when u were alone or something like that, jus keep writin u'll gain a sense of the topic towards wat u write

I really became angry with you when I was reading this poem, to think that you actually said all those things that you said you did. I don't blame her for not talking to you. God I would have had you killed

But still, I hope you show her this and I hope some comfort for both of you comes from it. Atleast you said what you wanted to say. As far as structure and flow of the poem itself. It wasn't too bad, I actually liked the repeatative lines I thought that not only added "bulk" to the poem, but they solidified the meaning behind it.

Stay up

This had a big, fat, wet genuine mark on it. A piece that others will see. And though maybe not like how it's written. With the repetitivness executed with such simplicity. But the meaning and personal emotions behind it. The way it is straightforward and in a sense, pure, will appeal to them.

It's good for what it is skibba...

..resp...

Shiznit's Thoughts:


Sometimes saying 'Sorry' too many times immunizes that one person you were saying them to. But in all due times, you mean them altogether that actually responded with such guilt to what uve done. Apologies can be accepted depending on the cause. Just make sure the next time you say sorry..you actually mean it.

Your repitition somewhat supported everything with intact emotions flowed through with it. Nothing to critique about anything on this because its just the way you wrote it that expressed the point entirely.

AngellicalR ...Edgar Allan Poe stuff are pretty intense ..maybe you kinda felt it with the whole repetition thing similarities goin on.

Nothing more to say. Nice and simple poem.

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<br><br><center>- Shiznit -
- Tampons are still expensive -
- That's a Fact - </center>