the real weed-------------------THE REAL WEED---------------------

Weed is wot I need and no it doesn’t come down to greed
Only non-smokers see it as erb not to be freed
From da chains of suppression, no depression there naïve
Believe wot u believe, but don’t contrive, wot you conceive
Tetrahydrocanabinol can’t compare to over drinking alcohol
Won’t end up like George Best - rotted liver yall still have it all
Hands wont shake at all - no pissed stupor fall
No violent attackin, after louse swaying-stumbling from the pub
No eye blackin, or forehead crackin, by a crazy fuckin thug
How can’t this be good, never happens when ya smokin da bud
Only lots of love, hippies smoke it and everyone’s their brov-
-It’s the gov, who alienate it from people quotin its danger-uz
I’ve had some of the best nights while smokin it - creatin times of bliss
-No brain abyss - its all a myth,
You don’t believe in unicorns so don’t believe in this
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Don’t N.D.eva to be good, N.D.eva to be bad
Never believe wot people say cos drugs don’t make u mad
Yes I said - cos drugs don’t make u mad!!!
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Hash, it’s a necessity its like ma homeopathic remedy
Fuck moderation - drug collaboration – more than drinking erbal tea
No big deal - every day people die from accident and worse things
When was the last time someone died while smokin wit their friends
Let me think, a whitey is the worst thing, don’t try an take a lend
-Yes I intend - to keep smokin foreva until my life comes to an end
When I’m lying in a coffin, me want a big blunt lit in my lips
And every one at the funeral to be laughing and getting completely blitzed
But for now ignore the narrow minded, there blinded with contemptment
Just cos we’ve got bigger balls - there full of anger and resentment
Eyes ov tunnel vision - seeing the normal straight ahead
Were to the left out of sight - they can’t hear wot I just said
Only the black uniforms and sniffers can see without the blinkers
Why do they want to arrest us, should be getting the rowdy drinkers
There the ones who cause the damage wit their itchy trigger fingers
------------------------------------
Don’t N.D.eva to be good, N.D.eva to be bad
Never believe wot people say cos drugs don’t make u mad
Yes I said - cos drugs don’t make u mad!!!
------------------------------------
Cannabis, Hash, Ganja, Dope, Smoke, Skunk, Weed and Pot
How can something with so many names be wrong - ITS OBVIOUSLY NOT
Look at all the countries that smoke it open, free and legally
Surely if it was harmful, the whole world would ban it emphatically
Now the laws are leaner, don’t get locked up for erb possession
Once its down to a class 3 drug, gonna celebrate wit a session
Wot a blessin, if you get caught then; ask the law if they want a lesson
Only time will tell if it works, until then you should try to relax
But knowing my luck - when this happens - they’ll slap on a fuckin tax

------------------------------------

Yes I said – “DRUGS DON’T MAKE U MAD” ………………………..

this piece was good...you had some nice vocab and you stuck to the subject well...it also had good flow...the only thing I'd say you need to work on is ya multi'z...I seen that you only be rhymin' one word...you should try to rhyme like 2 or more wordz...it makez ya shit sound a whole lot better...holla...

oh yeah...and can ya peep my latest open mic?????? it's called Behind Barz...I just finished it tonight and ain't nobody seen the 3rd verse yet...

just been lookin at ya open mic, good shit dawg, thankz for the advice on mine, takin it on board, watch for da next spit

aight!!!!!!!!!

yeah decent rhymes. the way you only rhyme each word once for most of the song kinda makes the rhyme not flow as well as they could. try to keep a rhyme going for jus a lil longer and you will notice how much better the rhyme sounds keep droppin, workin on it and you'll improve- Peace

hahahah that shit was pretty hot good drop good drop good vocab keep spittin

uppin............................................. ............. .
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it was cool man

keep em coming

***********************THE FEEDBACK***********************

Basic Comment- These verses are nice.. A good use of vocabulary and your wordplay is novice division. Well Done.. I liked reading this peice.

Wordplay: (7/10)

Your Wordplay like I said previously was novice. You have a nice selection of words to play around with. I especially liked these lines-

When I’m lying in a coffin, me want a big blunt lit in my lips
And every one at the funeral to be laughing and getting completely blitzed
But for now ignore the narrow minded, there blinded with contemptment
Just cos we’ve got bigger balls - there full of anger and resentment

~~Those were the highlights in my opinion~~

Metaphors: (5/10)

A fair mark, Metaphors were slimly shown, but I didn't really see you coming out with alot of solid metaphors. Though you did have some, Im not saying you didn't have any.

Vocabulary: (8/10)

A high mark, you used pure knowledge, though sometimes, when I was reading your verse, I knew you didn't know what you were talking about. You need to work on understanding them and wording them together. I'm sure you know alot, but just work on this.

Creativity: (15/20)

A really good mark, I liked the verse from the titles to the ending, this was great creativity on your part. Nice Work.

Rhyme Scheme: (12/25)

You didn't really have a consistant Ryhme Scheme, sometimes you had 3 ryhmes, interconnecting with a 2 line ryhme scheme. You should do the ryhme scheme like this.

....................A
....................A
....................B
....................B

Anyways, thats it for the Basic Feedback, Peace.

i thought this was a ill piece,good vocab,good structure,good rhyme scheme,u stayed on point wit tha topic and tha topicwas ill,all in all this was a 10 out of 10 drop,keep droppin tha hotness.~1~

uppin yall......................

thanx for da lov brov
be sure to check yall rhymes an giv you an honest opinion, aight

KEEP DROPPIN......................

was a good piece man I enjoyed readin it. nice use of vocab but ur rhyme scheme could use some work. it had an alright flow through the whole thing and all in all I thought it was a pretty good peice so keep droppin bro.

oh and don't forget to check out mine and masta c's open mic called "this life we hate (ft Masta C)" and also our newest one which I will be posting sometime today called "high times" also featuring Masta C so keep an eye out for it and leave some feedback. thanx in advance peace.

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<center><table style=filter:GLOW(color=red)>Atmosphere - inspirations of following in the footsteps of story tellin rhymes</table></center>

<center>Corrupted Visions</center>

<center><table style=filter:GLOW(color=black)>Giving Sight A Third Eye</table></center>

yo this is coms homie....your nice wit it playa...just come with some more multis and mettas(ask stephen if you dont know how) but other than thjat it was a solid piece...
get a battle record and join omens

check out my new peice, did it before the feedback from the last so i havnt had a chance to take on board wot was said

check it................................