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Old 10-23-03, 06:43 PM   #1
Maven
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[Wk3] T Square vs Ill Mental

IP: A9A7 727D

Verses Due: Friday, October 31st 2003
Voting Ends: Monday, November 3rd 2003

Pick A Topic From This List

Make it Dope.
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Old 10-23-03, 09:18 PM   #2
Mental God
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not sure what topic i am going to do... do we have to decide right away?

Last edited by Mental God : 10-24-03 at 01:57 AM.
 
Old 10-24-03, 01:37 AM   #3
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Fuck the fuckin fake ass faggot Florida Marlins, Hope they Choke, and I fuckin hate the Yankee's.
Fuck, Jus like the cubbies, I cant win....

Could I do my own topic.....

Eat, Shit, And die, notice the commas making it a statement not an insult,
If not I'll do empty casket
 
Old 10-24-03, 02:22 AM   #4
Mental God
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Betrayed by faith:

What is faith? I read the webster's to find out
But theres many definitions, i cant figure what it's about
My mind has a drought, but the seed still finds a way to sprout
And without a doubt, religion has me headed on the right route
Or so it seems, faith has made me blinded by the light
Haunting my dreams, can't see the difference between left and right
I take a bite, chew on the different ideas that come with faith
Like believing in a god, who has supposedly kept you safe
Untill the one day, when god has to take away your life
Not by taking life from your body, but by taking away your wife
Or just taking the one person, who makes living life worth the time
You have memories of their sweet voice, mixed with the sound of a flatline
Lives intertwine, and you have faith that it happens for a reason
When in reality it happens the same way that we change the 4 seasons
It just happens, and there is no god that changes fate
You can debate all the reasons, but your born with clay on your plate
You have to learn how to mold it, cause faith wont do it for you
Like origami you have to fold it, it stays for life like a tattoo
Its a never-ending artwork that you yourself have to imbue
How could anyone stay true, in this modern world follow the guidelines
You watch from the sidelines, as the color flows out side the lines
Faith controlls minds, its leads to war then leads to peace
As the hand on the clocks winds, you pick up your soul peice by peice
And with some elbow grease, you put it back together like a puzzle
Then you finally see the big picture, find your mouth around a gun muzzle
Now your in trouble, cause religion has led you to believe
That with faith you receive knowledge, and will no longer be naive
But you've been decieved, faith wears masks just like the devil
Deaf from the sound of revel, that echoes from below the ground level
So all your life, you have been faithful to your beliefs
But faith has you running in circles, living your life as a motif
I grind religion up like beef, it looks so similar when its refined
So i remind mankind of the similarities that we find
Holy wars being waged, when one faith crosses another
Pitting friends against friends, pitting brother against brother
It splits a child from its mother, is a belief worth all this pain
When we are all family, the same blood runs in our veins
But still we show no shame, fight for beleifs that are masquerades
While the whole time we cant see that by our Faith we've been betrayed
 
Old 10-28-03, 01:17 AM   #5
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Eat Shit And Die::::::

It sounds insulting rude and unrational to speak/
Resulting in a routine thats followed millions of times a week/
We eat digest consume take grab swallow and savor/
Then waste crap shit deficate excreet repeat an forget about the flavor/
We need a savior cause multiple cycles all eventually end in death/
Rape cash Bovine and devour bull with which you've been blessed/
But after you eat shit and die heavan or hell wont reward monetary succuss/
All three can happen within three hours jus look at elvis/
Died young on the crapper possibly because he was dieing to shit/
Or eating mushrooms, acid, extacy, prozac, or some barbituates/
When you eat shit you die, plain and simple painfull explanaitions/
Look at the amout our race wastes whithin other nations/
Trying to cheat death by passing the blame on a future thats wasting/
Away to nothing prestigious pitiful painfully screaming we need "this"/
I'm by far not religious but still believe everyone need Jesus/
We plant our seed and the womans egg eats it, then we shit out a fetus/
And its the miracle of life yet knowing the child will die, and we still dont believe this/
Could be the end overpopulation overconsumption jus proves that its over/
So Eat shit and die, its explanation is jus somethin answered in the eye of the beholder/

Alright, thats it, Its not on the list but its done.....
T-
 
Old 10-28-03, 02:10 AM   #6
Mr.Christensen
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Ill mental...
Your approach to the topic was pretty straight forward. It was a very easy read due to it flowing very well. The content blew my mind. I liked how you told a story without using characters but showed how religion takes you from childhood to adulthood. At first the length looked like it was going to be a problem but when you use your lines wisely lenght just prolongs the enjoyment

T Squared...
Hmm well, The 1st thing that threw me off was you lack of commas. You needed them many times through out you verse. The apporach about the topic was rather general. You did keep to the point but from one line to the next you lost me because they didnt relate to each other. With commas in the correct places this would have been an easier read. Good job none the less

Vote - Ill Mental
 
Old 10-31-03, 08:24 PM   #7
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Last edited by Mental God : 10-31-03 at 08:28 PM.
 
Old 11-01-03, 09:31 AM   #8
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good battle

illmental gets my vote however
the imagery and metaphors u used won this really
loved the clay on the plate line..overall u put down a solid verse which stayed on topic and was scattered with quotable lines

t-square

hate to vote against u again cos i enjoy reading your stuff......i dont think many ppl get your writing on here...(retadedness or inability to grasp your style...i dunno) but i liked ths verse alot
covered quite a few areas of the topic well and i liked the scheme contrary to whatppl think
some standout lines....but just couldnt edge it over ill mental
 
Old 11-02-03, 12:47 AM   #9
Mental God
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T square... i have to give you props dawg...


All three can happen within three hours jus look at elvis/
Died young on the crapper possibly because he was dieing to shit/
^^^this line had ,me laughing for at least 5 mins...
 
Old 11-02-03, 11:12 AM   #10
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T-squares verse just didn't hit me that hard. I felt Ills more. It was straight till the end where as T's had fallin off points n elevate, then fall.

vote - Ills

ps ill-mental your vote was erased in my battle, go peep the real battle. WE need votes on Mystery & Edicius.
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