i hate my life and all that i have in it
i cant find a way to leave from this shit
i just wanna get out i just wanna quit
leave everyone and everything i've known
all because one person left me on my own
i can see my life in a downward spiral
i dont want to do this shit - not another mile
seems like my life wasnt even worthwhile
everyones so versatile when i cant smile
i dont know how they do it but i just cant
now when i look back i begin to rant
just because of all the things i did for nothing
i gave her anything
for her i would give everything
but everything isnt anything so im left with nothing
now you think im gunna let you treat me like this
im just gunna pretend you didnt exsist
i told myself i wont get hurt
but all you did was keep me on alert
cause i know there are more people like you
you want me to be around when you need me most
now you wont see me anymore...im a ghost
because you didnt like what i did, you made me convert
now that its over i think im ready to revert
so pass me that bowl and light me up kid
only because this is the one thing you forbid

its okay man there are people who love you....j/k.....another good piece same sort of theme and emotion in it.......lots of hidden anger i would think......depression that sort of thing......the flow is nice in this one as well.....i'd like to see you branch out a little bit.....but keep dropping like this and you'll catch attention fast....great piece homie

respect...

damn.. thas sad this is an aigh ventin piece

all i know is.. if a girl does u wrong, honestly i say fuck her.. she obviously wasnt worth ya time & energy, if she gon do u like that, but thas jus my opinion

the emotion is nice, the flow is ok, like prophiit said.. keep droppin, mad respect 1

I can relate deeply. If a girl dun fuck wit you shes not worth it but theres always that lil peice in ur heart sayin u still like her. Nice way to vent. words are always the way to go instead of hurting urself. Nice keep droppin

iight

pretty good drop, but its alot like the other, just shows you got that alot on your mind, and keep writing it down get it out, coz its looking good here to me. this had a nice smooth flow and it got across some pretty hard felt emotion. only thing im telling u is to try to up your vocab some and like prophiit said, branch out some.

~Tera~
DONT HATE

__________________

i liked this...had good emotion an anger...you could really feel the buzz.i liekd how you ended it..it was drastic...good drama

__________________
Open Mics
The Weathers Art
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=108673
My Teenage Eyes
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...threadid=104850
Secluded
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...851#post1148851
Open Your Eyes
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...461#post1157461

thanks everyone...but i just have one question...what do you mean by branch out?

they probably mean explore new topics try new writing techniques use description find a new theme to work with all of the above

i thought this was a love sick poem that is typically posted on boards like these

it was nicley stated that you think people dont care (thats the vibe i got) but youve got to understand that everyone goes through theses things and its what makes us WHO we are and how we react to things

it was probably a good thing for you to experience this
i bet you thank your heavenly stars that its over with and that you can learn from it and not have it happen the same way again next time huh?


life is hard and love is one of the harder things to deal with

I have an opinion..... go hang yourself

The Red Sox kick ass!