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Old 11-28-03, 09:22 AM   #1
HaycH
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In my eyes

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This can be translated many ways..


I stand on the doorway watching you sink
No tears in my eyes not even a blink
You gave me a place in your heart
But i use it and tear it apart
Granted me with your trust
I exploit it and blow it away like the dust
Blinded by the fire in my eyes your trust for me grows higher
Slandered by my words you wait for a day that’s brighter
You can no longer stand as i witness the down fall of your soul
I gaze into your eyes and watch you fall
You faintly whisper i thought we were friends
What have i done to deserve this revenge
Me you will never be able to see
And for that you'll never be free
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Old 11-28-03, 11:36 AM   #2
.:LadySage:.
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Nice, I liked this.
When i first read it, i was thinking about a relationship, where youre doing the person wrong intentionally. But then my whole thoughts flipped. I started thinking about the corruption of society, and how there arent many TRUE people out there. I saw you realixing the pain that you was causing ut no caring, just using this person as a step stool to help you get higher.
But i also saw it as a person that's very dependant on you, and very clingy, expecting you to take care of everything, and that path making them weaker, causing them to sink lower, and you just watch it and it doesnt affect you b/c you didnt like being the supporter, and having all the responsibilities on your plate, and they realize, but it's to late........
now that i htink about it, i can interpert this like 20 more different ways, but fortunately i'm not, lol, but this was a real nice piece, it made me think, and not many pieces do that. I enjoyed it.
keep it up
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Poetry
Don't Look Into My Eyes Forgotten
Understanding
Once Again
"It requires wisdom to understand wisdom:
the music is nothing if the audience is deaf."
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Old 11-28-03, 05:50 PM   #3
HaycH
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Thanks for the words ladysage. Jyeh your right so far and theres many more ways.
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Old 11-28-03, 07:04 PM   #4
Tourniquet
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This is wonderful... the brutal honesty, and lack of mercy.... I love it. You are right, it could be percieved in many ways this piece, to many different equations... But for me, it was that blatant 'Im fucking you over' attitude that you have written that I love. No remorse, nothing lol Its so refreshing to see!

Love it... Great write.
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Old 11-29-03, 04:39 AM   #5
HaycH
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Glad people are understanding and feeling this. Thanks for the words Tourniquet.
Question: where in aus are you?
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Old 11-29-03, 06:35 PM   #6
uraddiction
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i liked this piece this could be precieved in many ways. i feel this was about a relationship and how u dont care what they think you are gonna get back at them . great read.
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Old 11-29-03, 11:08 PM   #7
HaycH
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Why is this section so dead all of a sudden
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Old 11-30-03, 08:12 PM   #8
HaycH
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Bump... bump
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Old 12-02-03, 03:53 AM   #9
HaycH
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last time im bumpin this izm
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