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Youtube Video for my song "CARRY ON"

once again..links..i know you leave more feedback than just about everyone besides atticus...but you still need links...i'll leave feedback after i see that

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Time is not long, and indecision is hells cemment. So the well is rented, untill heaven is relevant. Untill then, to be eloquent, sex cells, so le'ts cellibate.

"watch what you watchin...fox keeps feedin' us toxin's..stop sleepin' start thinkin outside of the box and unplug from the matrix doctrine....but watch what you say cause big brother is watchin" - nas - sly fox

The I.H.C.J.S.F.M.T.R.H.P.M.M.W.T.S.M.S.I.T.F.F.W.A.S. O Crew

I like it.. its simple... but still complex... cause u stayed with ur subject... but every piece led to something else... that tied it all together... good drop

I really like this....i mean its real deep....lol.....call me educated...nice though keep doin ya thang boo...1

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its simple but good.

You lonely or something?.. hmmm Anyway I like this though it was crazy sort... the point was repeated often and thus drilled into the minds of teh readers... there no guess work on this one it's pretty up front... and though I usually like fairly vague poetry this one was pretty decent... respects given... 1

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nothing complex about your rhymes damn man you can't even write a complete bar look man you must elevate fast don't let nobody pull your legs this was not good at all homey maybe for a comedy newspaper or something try and write some real stuff reach deep now alot folks won't like it but fuck them just do your thing feel me?

I didn't write this with any poetic structure in mind...just wanted to express how I felt.








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Youtube Video for my song "CARRY ON"

Hm, pretty basic, but as you said it was a vent/rant type of piece so those are usually alittle ruff around the edges. I dont know, I really would have like to have seen alot more said... It wasn't even that the structuring was basic, but the content was also extremely simplisitic in the sense that, with the repeating lines and the 4 or so lines of filler it read almost like a childs story. I know it was only a rant but still, there are alot of creative angles you could take to aproach this and describe your feelings. So, not sure if you're just stopping by or are getting into poetry for the long haul, but if you end up writing again try and just think creativily about how you can say whats on your mind... Because originality and individuality in poetry is a huge thing.