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09-25-04, 01:51 PM | #1 | ||
Detrimental Thoughts
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I Pray
IP:
--I Pray--
--Verse One-- In this life i lead, have i suffered enough? My fathers such an ass he only comes the 1st of the month While days keep passin us by Watchin trouble go down in my community Watchin these children die Ya wonder why we smokin weed Everdays hell and every minute of it's a struggle Everyday's trouble with someone alwayz bustin ya bubble No time to cuddle with so and so cuz you got someone clockin ya Every single second anymore someones watchin ya Everyday there's a new problem, somethin new to solve It's funny how money is what we revolve Not me, i can't let the evil of the money trap me There's people makin quick money and others actin ratty It's crappy, shit...the whole world is shitty Got ho's tryin to get with me, no one has pity People livin it good can't even relate I might live life wrong but i pray for God to open the gates To let me in, out of this whirlwind To let me out this world of sin I pray --Chorus-- I pray for the Lord to let me out of this world I try to do things right, i try to keep good morals I try to go by um' and i try not to sin But the devil keeps puttin me back in this whirlwind --Verse Two-- Let me start on race and people who're racist I can relate to this, i have room to say shit People can't face it, the world is bad and full of racists And what you're seein before you, the ghetto raised this Get this, i lived a life of bein the only white kid in the projects But what happens in this world is hard to see through these cob webs Everything is so old and has been for years untouched Bush fucked up and made things worse and gave me this adrenaline rush Things are ruff anymore and people see no open doors All they see is a life of bein poor and nothing more Everyone can give a fuck less about the people at the bottom They have the worst of the problems well be happy you don't got um' I know i got um', what the fuck you think this rap about Oh i'm just sayin this shit for fun, FUCK do i gotta shout? Oh no shit this song has got some meaning to it When people hear it they don't even try to do shit They sit back on their lazy ass and wait for things to get worse They don't care at all till they feel their next in the hearse Oh yea sure they go pray to GOD then But the thing is, he'll never see eye-to-eye with you again But i still pray --Chorus-- I pray for the Lord to let me out of this world I try to do things right, i try to keep good morals I try to go by um' and i try not to sin But the devil keeps puttin me back in this whirlwind People don't care anymore They see the worlds racist They see Bush is messin things up But they don't do shit They sit, and wonder why we losin our kids They out there fightin for us But fightin for somethin there's no need to fight for Them stupid asses made the mistake and didn't elecet Al Gore Now we have the problem with 2 president candidates Bush and Kerry, they are never there and caring Bush makin wars and Kerry tryin to raise taxes People in mental hospitals goin crazy in straight jackets People on the streets shootin each other up But is anyone there to give a fuck? No...the world is still racist and still has problems Everyone soon will be livin at the bottom Just the way things are goin But soon this country won't be the greatest nation Soon there won't be nothin But i'll be there I'll pray........
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Soundclick Last edited by Ruffridah187 : 09-25-04 at 01:56 PM. Reason: messed up a couple things |
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09-25-04, 01:57 PM | #2 | |
-BTR-
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IP:
ay this was pretty good. looks like u put some thought into this one. good structure good flow good idea overall. i would give this a 7.5 keep doing ur thing
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09-25-04, 05:54 PM | #3 | ||
Detrimental Thoughts
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IP:
hey man thanx.....i dunno what inspired me to write this.....it just came on to me....i'm sure somethin like that has happened to you......come on people......i need more feedback
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09-25-04, 11:47 PM | #4 | |
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IP:
nice I say about 8.2/10
I'm so damn happy theres people here talkin about real shit and not about guns and only making diss tracks and shit flowed nice and easy to read we can do a collab if ya want you see how me and senario's turned out lol peace
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The Competition
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09-26-04, 12:22 AM | #5 | ||
I have a lot to learn...
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IP:
^word.. good shit.. you can tell it came from the heart.. good flow.. nice concepts..
7.5/10
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09-26-04, 01:05 AM | #6 | ||
Better than you..
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IP:
nice job mate..........this was a good drop i felt it.
7.6/10
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..ADLIB..
Spit it from the heart, spit a thousand darts, split ya head apart…
Emcees depart, like rubin carter my hurricane left u scarred… Like a spiked bat grammatical bar, like a wonderland drug… Tumble - ing like a flagon of rum and 2 blunts, like the funk baby… |
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09-26-04, 01:08 PM | #7 | ||
Detrimental Thoughts
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IP:
hey people thanx for the feeback....i'm actually proud of this piece......somethin people actually gave me good feedback on.....thanx for the feedback......please more feedback
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Soundclick |
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09-26-04, 01:35 PM | #8 | ||
New to RB
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IP:
i like it good flow and very true words i give it a 7.75/10
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C.C.C.P. = USSR Don't be Afraid:
N.O.K. is some bitch asses i'm taking the hole crew on by myself |
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09-27-04, 12:06 AM | #9 | ||
Detrimental Thoughts
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IP:
thanx for the feedback everybody.....i didn't think anyone like this....i guess i was wrong......but come on people.....i need more feedback
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09-27-04, 12:24 AM | #10 | ||
Flyweight
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IP:
Yo I felt it man, deep I like your mind I wrote a song kinda like type of level. check it out mind of vision. and the chosen what tell me what you think. And yo I think some parts you got deep then you switched you style real quick like try to stay more into it. not bad flow... overall 7/10 keep writting hommy.
one... |
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09-27-04, 07:16 AM | #11 | ||
Detrimental Thoughts
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IP:
aight i'll take a look at your shit after school today......thanx for the fed back.....come on......uppin for more feedback
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Soundclick |
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09-28-04, 04:03 PM | #12 | ||
Detrimental Thoughts
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IP:
come on more feedback people
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Soundclick |
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09-28-04, 07:38 PM | #13 | |
Hell yeah
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IP:
yo this was so good...the lyrics are so good dude
Number One |
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