piece of peace absent abstract mackin relaxin packin the plastic gun
state of gangstasism i rank this schizm up wit part of the catholic one
drastic my approach the opposite of lavish savagery mind in text
remindin time rewindin time my rhymes complex
just, um, take from my words what they appear to be
messages let em lie dormant thats why whites fear a g
its no reasoning with the ignorant the kid is careening
off course but of course theirs no hidden meaning
rummage like an old women in an attic in search of her youth
bring you to the start wut i sed so far is turned loose
as i burn a blunt i learn from a noose its busted shit
rusted clips leave our lives blueprinted by injustices
my best friend shot givin me a handshake, last breath in my arms~
now i carry his heart mentally and his mind spiritually in my palms~
scratching the surface he was robbed when red~
tip my hat to nicci my nigga cause God is dead~

bleh, 1luv.

::juss words from a boi::
in the beginnin i was really feelin u an followin along nicely but towrds the middle i got kinda lost it seems like it trailed into a more up front subject so gave me a slight unbalanced feelin bout the poem but all in all it was dope i liked it especially the final line i love the way u ended it but like i said i was a lil lost towards the end but wut do i kno? i like it none the less and im sha sumone will see wut im missin...

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...do tell...

Every lil boi is born shi......their ignorance makes them bold......

simply put"...wise words whisperd to deaf ears as no one hears the blurred proverbs that're always spoken clear so i fuckin swear that my where wont be here as time tolls..." second verse of 'Elevate' written by -shi-

very creative piece, i enjoyed every aspect of it. the concrete imagery and sence of emotion. all the details were good. i'll be looking out for moer of your stuff

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Battle Verse You Suck
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=113510

ok piece, good wordplay
fave line "remindin time rewindin time my rhymes complex"

drop a vote on my battle
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=108195

^Thanks for all the replies ya'll, elevation is key, 1luv.

This was real nice, I felt it. I like your style.
It wasn't too long, the emotion was felt, flow,
word play was all right. Message was clear, understandable.
Real nice read. Everything in this piece respectably
complimented your talent. keep writing, i'll read.

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~.:Soft Focus:.~
{--Deacon (\_/~\_/) Content --}
{-Calisto (\_/~\_/) .:Lady Sage:.-}
{--Filed (\_/~\_/) Domain 9--}
{-Thrust (\_/~\_/) Know1 (\_/~\_/) Emotion-}
{ --Rule (\_/~\_/) Mental God--}
Poetry
Don't Look Into My Eyes Forgotten
Understanding Once Again
"It requires wisdom to understand wisdom:
the music is nothing if the audience is deaf."

^Thank you ma, as always, elevation is key, 1luv.