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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
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| View Poll Results: Should I make it audio? | |||
| Yes....Its Ill!!! |
  
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3 | 75.00% |
| Nah...U wack!!! |
  
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1 | 25.00% |
| Voters: 4. You may not vote on this poll | |||
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01-26-04, 07:48 AM
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#1
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Guest
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Title track from my Mixtape...."Unlimited Wisdom"
IP:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?p=1126556#post1126556
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...556#post1126556 http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...564#post1126564 ________________________________________ "Unlimited Wisdom" Chorus Sometimes I feel I have to display my Extreme Point of View Cos otherwise I feel exploited..Capitalist System Got me confused Feelin abused..Workin all day..So these "Leaders" can live Sweet ...Express Unlimited Wisdom...Express Unlimited Wisdom.... X2 Verse 1 At the moment my mind states not great..Problems eat away And the night sky fades away...My whole soul begins to decay Into nothingness...Life ain't sweet its an endless pit of sorrow Life ain't certain...Visions are blurry when concerning tomorrow I wish I could grow wings...fly away Above The toublesome Earth Is it a curse were doomed to war?..groomed for hate from our birth? I don't know bout this but I can't get the answers from myself... ...Government Leaders have secret meeting by themselves.... ...To discuss OUR fate...How can they be the ones who decide?... ..When we go to war, Fight for them..N when we fight they hide?.. Behind our bullet ridden corpses..Hiding behind their blanket of lies.. ..And as loved ones lie in graves..We wipe our eyes..They live their lives...... Chorus Sometimes I feel I have to display my Extreme Point of View Cos otherwise I feel exploited..Capitalist System Got me confused Feelin abused..Workin all day..So these "Leaders" can live Sweet ...Express Unlimited Wisdom...Express Unlimited Wisdom.... X2 Verse 2 Expressing Myself in Modern Situations could be a Gift or a Curse Express My Extreme Point of View..Battlin, I ain't gonna be the first Ever to wanna change My own life..Visions Of myself Incomplete How can Queen Elizabeth see.."When I live street N she lives Neat"? For Teenagers mothers gettin pregnant..Wots life got in store? For these Girls whose Lovers do not care..Girls Cuin at the door Is it I'm scared to death....Or am I scared of what I see? Scared Of vision I guess...Lookin around paranoidically The wizardz of our time...Castin spellz to make death Chemical wars, biological weaponz...Will I take my last breath? The Armageddon will happen...War will ravage us blind Death will not cease...If you believe so,Your sanity'z left behind In another state of matterz maybe our Humanity will survive But as will live with Trife and Strife...All we can do is strive Some can claim No one man can change it...That I believe But how can you tell me Billionz were put on earth to bleed? It takes an nation of millionz...Or a strong army of many All in together in this life...Livin together,the death toll be plenty How can religion cause warz?...Deep down religionz bullshit A way to control the masses?...Dead right, I can't take it So if my time doth come now...I'm ready for the takin But I'm goin out fightin...The Grim Reaper won't be reapin Chorus Sometimes I feel I have to display my Extreme Point of View Cos otherwise I feel exploited..Capitalist System Got me confused Feelin abused..Workin all day..So these "Leaders" can live Sweet ...Express Unlimited Wisdom...Express Unlimited Wisdom.... X2 NEED SOME GOOD FEEDBACK N IF U WANNA HEAR THE AUDIO |
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01-26-04, 07:50 AM
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#2
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Mona Lisa.
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IP:
this is a load of Crap
j/p nice one darius..dint know ya were writin as much!! good vocab n shit jus caught off flow a few times but apart from that it was a good,consistent piece we'll get recording more soon wen I'm not as busy!! working and college are jus too much blahhhhhhhhh PM me
__________________
"Woop Woop, its the sound of da police"
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01-26-04, 08:00 AM
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#3
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1E
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IP:
i agree this was ok, some of the wording knocked the flow a bit, but the main was decent, a good use fo vocab, but in some places the scheme seemed to lack a bit it creativity, but if i knew the beat it would be easier to judge.... decent, wouldnt mind listening to the audio when its done.....
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01-26-04, 09:07 AM
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#4
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Guest
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IP:
Ta for the feedbak...(Dev, are u frrom corrie?)...(How's Sunita?)....Jokes are fun...
Need some more feedbak........ |
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01-27-04, 11:35 AM
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#5
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Guest
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IP:
Check This Shit Out.
This Is Quality To The Highest Level. Gotta Be The Best Track Eva Wrote By My Man From College. |
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01-29-04, 04:57 AM
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#6
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Guest
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IP:
uppin
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01-29-04, 05:22 AM
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#7
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Guest
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IP:
!!!
Very nice man you touched on a lot of issues that need to be talked about and your flow was on track, nice wordplay...this was a good read. |
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01-29-04, 06:49 PM
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#8
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1E
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IP:
i jus edited this cos i already replied, but being under the influence i forgot, didnt read thru the replies....
Last edited by Dev : 01-29-04 at 06:52 PM. |
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02-05-04, 07:24 AM
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#9
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Guest
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IP:
i gotta say that this type of track wont really get u places, the topic is what alot of new artists start off on (i did it myself), as for the track it is very good but for an audio i wouldnt use it on ma 1st album......
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02-05-04, 07:28 AM
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#10
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Banned: Spamming
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IP:
its alright, it might sound better on audio, so i say do it. not bad tho. keep it up!
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02-05-04, 07:28 AM
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#11
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Guest
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IP:
Jus usin my thoughts...I don't wanna sell mate
Just make music people can relate 2..... And it ain't being used now any way to tell the truth, It's 2 involved wiv politics and my views to be put on...But I'm gonna make it for myself to listen 2 any way...cheers for the feedbak. |
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02-05-04, 07:54 AM
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#12
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Flyweight
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IP:
yeah it had all the basic components I'd expect in AUDIO
Had structure, flow, multies meaning, good verses good chorus *"leaders"* @ Dope I liked it JamesJr. Maybe add a 3rd verse just a suggestion
__________________
undefined Love for all real lyricists and poets ~~~~~~~~ Open Mics http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=112397 http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=111729 2nd Battle NEEDS 4 http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=111647 http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=110858   
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02-05-04, 08:10 AM
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#13
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Guest
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IP:
aiiiight....thanx for the feed bak!
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