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03-01-04, 02:50 AM | #1 | ||
New to RB
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blue and chrome
IP:
Blue and chrome, make you think of home? Then you must not know what i have known. For two years now, my brain this nightmares home. A child screams, "bring my cousin home". We all know this can't happen. He's passed through to the unknown. A child whispers, "I feel so alone". A shattered soul. Such trauma causes sudden stop of growth. Slowly the spiritual wounds will close. But forced me to evolve, like i was poured from a brand new mold. The thoughts of seuicide, I no longer can hold. So I scream to the heavens, "PLEASE, DON'T CONDEM MY SOUL"!!! I am but a lost child, I didn't know. But my screams fade, and warmth turns to cold.
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03-01-04, 10:25 PM | #2 | |
New to RB
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IP:
in the poems i have read you can really express your emotion. not many can do this they just talk about what they think they feel but i think you have it my man you tell the story with great heart and i like that in poems this is a great poem and i look forward to you making more.
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03-02-04, 12:44 AM | #3 | ||
New to RB
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6.8/10
IP:
I felt where you were comin' from. I could see tha potential in ya. Your picture is very creative and full of thought...uuhh! Thoughts, some weren't there. I could see more to it. It just feels you'd summed it all up as if you didn't want to take tha time for perfection.
Good Thought, Great Structure! |
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