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Old 03-11-04, 10:30 AM   #1
DirtBoy69
i changed my title !!
 
Posts: 941
From: Kincardine Ontario
my first full song

IP:

while people probably don't care but i've decided to start work on an lp and this is the first song i've written for it. it's jsut rough and not what's gonna be on the lp i just wanted to get it out i know the delivery needs work and flow and emotion but i wanted to know what you all felt about the lyrics

http://www.soundclick.com/util/Stre...ID=1025690&q=lo

http://www.soundclick.com/util/Stre...ID=1025690&q=hi
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Old 03-11-04, 04:05 PM   #2
Crossword
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well ya lyrics aint that bad... But like ya said, the emotion and flow seriously need some work. The lyrics really aren't that bad, if ya fix some up so they all flow together then it'd be iight...
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Old 03-13-04, 03:06 PM   #3
Razer
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From: South London, UK
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Flow is absolutely pathetic. Sorry Man but it is. Lyrics were o.k. It sounded like you were spitting low so you didnt want you mom to here in the other room. Im not trying to diss but thats just what it sounded like.
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Old 03-15-04, 09:24 AM   #4
DirtBoy69
i changed my title !!
 
Posts: 941
From: Kincardine Ontario
IP:

thanks for the replies last up
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Old 03-20-04, 10:24 PM   #5
Discreet
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*spotz a hata n slapz him*
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Old 03-31-04, 02:35 PM   #6
Lil Rip
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From: G.A.
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i could barely understand you
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Old 04-01-04, 03:35 AM   #7
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Actually No Offnce...but That Is Just Really Whack Im Sorry
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Old 04-01-04, 01:12 PM   #8
DeVaZtAtE MinDz
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From: J-Ville
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it isn't good, dont put it on your LP ok? keep the lyrics and improve everything else.
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Old 04-01-04, 02:05 PM   #9
Adebisi
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You really suck

God that was bad
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Old 04-01-04, 07:19 PM   #10
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....iight the lyrics were alright...but the BEAT WAS CRAZY...SOLETERNITY?
youngbuck did a song to that beat...it sucked but thats info for you

you need to work on ya voice and pronunciation and flow...you just liek whatever on the track....um...work on puttin emotion into that...you just like EH and thats it you need to put some attitude into that...flow will come with that!

keep em comin and work on it
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