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Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio ![]() |
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Returning to my home
IP:
Flippin drastic TECHNIQUES , UNIQUE INDEED swing it in and ill rape the BEAT/
Comin with shit that’s hard not to RESPECT, rhymes CONNECT cos I don’t need to REST/ Dizzyin, like nightclub STROBES, CONTROLS, the dilated LOBES/ Speeds immeasurably SUPERSONIC, HERBAHOLIC smokin the mic like it’s NARCOTIC/ Disect the game like its BIOLOGY, scan the fame like its ASTROLOGY and ban the name like INDIVIDUALITY/ Your helpless hopin to SAMPLE, the FANTASTICAL the kmf is AMPLE/ From my armour I be called rap’s WARRIOR, invadin like a CONQUISTADOR, best hope u don’t meet me in ya CORRIDOR/ Unlike others no need to fast FOWARD, quality shit, receivin AWARDS move TOWARD, me and ill break ya like FORD/ Alone I break the CONVENTION, INVENTIN flows like THOMAS EDISON, with INTENTION, murder the weak with CONVICTION i kno it aint the best but hit me up its my first post in a few months. |
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IP:
the flow is good, i gotta give ya props on the vocab. But... it looks like you tryin to hard relax and let the shit flow dawg.
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IP:
aight i kno cuz i aint written anythin in a while busy wit exams and shit but thanks for replyin always appreciatin feedback
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i changed my title !!
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IP:
not bad i can see a pretty good flow but the volcab lacks in spots just up that and this will be a dope peice
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win loss record 18-19 with 7 k.o's and sign up for the battle league would yeah, also show up if your already in the league |
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IP:
this wuz nice, liked the vocab in rhymes, phatt complexity and some dope creativity, props dawg... pz
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IP:
aight thanks for ya feedback def eppreciatin it. uppin
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IP:
uppin
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IP:
Liked the wordplay in this man, and some of the lines were powerful, used a quicc rhyme scheme that I thought was quite simplistic... The multies were decent and helped the rhythm, but I thought the bars were too short and it made it slightly choppy... The vocab was nicely used, some good knowledge words, aint no problems there... Wordplay and some punches were nice man, aint no substance to this though, it was same old, gets a bit boring, I read bout 5 of there already... Think you should spit something original, open some eyes and ish... This was solid though, keep spitting and elevating...
Peez... |
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IP:
lol yea def bro appreciate ya takin the time to think bout wat ur writin and give sum prop criticism. aight uppin again
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IP:
not 2 bad . i was feelin the internal rhyme scheme. structure needed a lil work, but i was feelin this. stay up.
joey |
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