Battle Rules:

12 Lines
No Crew Votes
No Recycling
No Biting

Minimum posts to vote: 200

Check in by: 12-21-04 at 09:08 PM

Must drop verse in 180 minutes after check in.

schema has ACCEPTED this battle on 12-21-04 08:38 PM.

Infector Mindz has ACCEPTED this battle on 12-21-04 08:42 PM.

ignite-ur-name..rehearse ur pre-written verse 3 more timez an i bet tha fight-endz-tha-same/ *1
even ur pre-writez-are-lame..itz like i put ur "PlayStation to ablaze" by tha way i "light-ur-game"..!!// 2


"wack"..u basically providin-tha-definition..kid u lost this shit from tha start confidin-wit-tha-opposition/3
denied-being-a-musician..competitively opposin me?..i'll "(w)hole Punch u" like u "colliding-wit-my-ammunition"..!!// 4
ya spit-is-thru..an "like my previous barz" ya already been "ripped-in-two"/ (get it?)5
an this-iz-true..that like "pimpz callin out ho'z for bj'z".. bitch-ya-blew// 6

i laughed at how you chose to lay-text/ 7
dude'z linez been-played-to-test..call me out again an i'lll "put-wirez-in-ya-mouth" like "Kanye-West"..!!//8

i'm too-sick-ta-boast..but this cat is "fast to hit base" cuz he'z "quik-to-post"/9
"this haz jus a roast"..an i gotcha "askin fa shade" in this battle like "u-need-a-ghost"..!!//10

3 min. k3ystyl3z..kinda makez me wonder if he tendz-to-munch..but eitha way i'll end-this-dunce/11
he needed help so i lent-a-bunch..yet "emailin me boxin glovez" is tha only way schema can send-a-punch"..!!//12

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...Westcoast Heathen Is Back....

^^Kids Are Stupid On The Internet Like This...lol

My Music HOE

i punked your pic so now you tryin to act a man...stop it...
only streets you in got decorative lamps and matchin mailboxes...
youre a bitch...fuck outta here talkin all that urban stuff...
when willy wonka has to give you breaks to key your verses up...
bitch i use vet structure...you use urban flowz type shit...
difference is i-got-punches without "quotes and hyphens"...
but its cool you think youll beat me...im glad theres still dreamers...
asked the tyke what he wants to be when he grows up...he said schema...
my advice is quit the site...youre not exactly up for the next grammy...
plus if your mom sees you on rapverse...say hi to net nanny...
wish so bad you were black...these bruises bring you closer to that...
blah bliddy blah blah blah...who needs a closer?...youre wack...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v...-0255480294.jpg
^lmao...picture's worth a thousand bars...

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Voted For: schema

Schema took this clearly wit punches structure personals on tha pic an thats what wins battles...infector wtf dawg you need to fix the structure looks like shit you didnt have very many good punches mostly you just filled shit up need to work on structure an punches fa reelz fuck! just look at your shit it makes me dizy lmao this one has gotta go to schema if it dont i dont what people were reading vote-schema schem

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O.wning Y.ou D.aily

Y.ou Know My Style 20 Niggas Wit 40 Cals

see what i thought ya'll hate cuzza structure...shit when i really ripped a verse

__________________

...Westcoast Heathen Is Back....

^^Kids Are Stupid On The Internet Like This...lol

My Music HOE

no...its not like you are gonna lose because your structure sucks and you really had an ill verse...I rewrote your verse in vet structure for you...Im gonna help you out...and dont get pissed...voters can't see this until after they vote so its not swaying...

ignite your name...rehearse your pre written verse 3 more times and i bet the fight ends the same...
even your pre writes are lame...its like i put your PlayStation to ablaze by the way i light your game...
->>end of the first bar should be reworded to rhyme better...stretched as fuuuuck..."to ablaze" doesnt make sense..ablaze is an adjective not a verb...light your game is kind of a stretch just to rhyme...then you had to create the whole second half of the second bar to explain it...youre writing your verse around that wack urbanflowz structure but you arent good enough to do that...theres no rule that says you have to have 4 multis per bar...dont do it unless you can make it sound natural...
wack...youre basically providin the definition..kid u lost this shit from the start confidin wit the opposition...
denied being a musician...competitively opposin me?...i'll hole Punch you like you colliding wit my ammunition...
->>first line doesnt make sense unless you're talking about when I pmed you to tell you I no-showed to write a college essay...but then nobody knows about that except you and me...you shouldve explained...the whole second line doesnt make sense...its still really stretched and you are still saying shit that doesnt make sense just to get multis...
your spit is thru...and like my previous bars you already been ripped in two...
and this ia true...they like pimps callin out hos for bjs...bitch ya blew...
->>this is a good bar length for you...you should write all your bars about this length...its still obvious you are reaching hard for your multis but not as bad...the second part of the second line doesnt make sense...well it does...but its terrible...
i laughed at how you chose to lay text...dudes lines been played to test...
call me out again and i'll put wires in your mouth like Kanye West...
->>shouldve said played to death instead of played to test...the wires like kanye west thing is PLAAAAAYED...but you are getting better flow here at the end this is a good length and you arent reaching as much...one of the better bars in your verse...
i'm too sick too boast..but this cat is fast to hit base cuz he's quick to post...
this was just a roast...and i got you askin for shade in this battle like you need a ghost...
->>worst example of not making sense just so you can rhyme that ive ever seen...
3 min. keystyle..kinda makes me wonder if he tends to munch..but either way i'll end this dunce...
he needed help so i lent a bunch..yet emailin me boxing gloves is the only way schema can send a punch...
->>mailing boxing gloves thing is played to DEATH...youre still stretching for multis...tends to munch?

you arent good enough to use that structure...point blank...even if you were you still shouldnt because it is annoying...dont use quotations and hyphens...theyre annoying...dont explain punches or put shit like (get it?)...dotn put numbers or slashes at the end of your bars...if your line is so long that it runs over onto two lines it is too long...unless you write like this...

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...
blah blah blah blah...
..........................blah blah blah blah...

shoot for 12-15 syllables per line...youre trying to fit way too much into one line...write however you feel comfortable but most people that are good use one of two structures...

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...

OR

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...
blah blah blah blah...
..........................blah blah blah blah...

vets never write like this...

blah blah blah-blah-blah blah "blah blah"(1)/
blah-blah..!!//?1
blah blah blah blah blah-blah-blah blah "blah blah blah blah blah"/
blah-blah-blah-blah blah blah blah(2) blah..!!//?2

(1) blah blah blah blah blah
(2) blah blah blah blah blah blah blah

reason being that its sloppy and annoying...people understand multis without using dashes and people will understand your wordplay without quotes...if they wont you shouldnt use it...NEVER use explanations...if people wont understand it dont use it...you ever hear pac stop in the middle of the song and explain his punches?

shoot for having your bars roughly the same length and dont ever write a multi if you cant make it sound natural AND make sense...dont write your verse around multis write your multis around your verse...good solid punchlines and wordplay are 100 times more important than multis...punches and wordplay are the steak...multis are the parsley...makes it look a lot better but if youve gotta do one or the other stick with the steak...

thats all I can think of right now...if i remember something else i wanted to say ill post again...but you shouldnt run your mouth if you suck...everyone you battle is not gonna take the time to help you...

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Voted For: schema



this was a weak battle

Mindz...your structure was seriously stretched...your multies were forced in alot of cases...your punches were weak, your flow was weak.....overall unimpressive drop by

Schema...your was good...your structure was..good dat ends the goodness of ya drop an sadly with just that u won.

Flow: Schema
Struc: Schema
Punches: Neither
Personals: Neither
Metas: Neither
Multies: Neither
Vote" schema

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Voted For: schema

Schema won this one!

schema: this was a okay verse, i've seen way better ones!! but i guess u didn't try.

Structure: 7/10
flow:7/10
punch:6/10
vocab:5/10
Multi's: 1/10

Infector Mindz: seriously man, what's wit ur struct.??

Structure: 1/10
flow:2/10
punch:4/10
vocab:2/10
Multi's: 4/10

no offense, but it looks like you put more time into ur structure then the time u put to make ur verse!!

vote: schema

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Voted For: schema

[Color=Blue] Wow!!! He Merked This Guy With Ease He Had Better Verse Cus Of Tha Punches,Personals Metas Vokab It Wass Funny 2 Hes Strukture Wass Balanced Hot Ass Disses Mayn....

/V Schema