Battle Rules:

6 - 10 Lines
No Crew Votes
No Recycling
No Biting

Minimum posts to vote: 20

Check in by: 12-25-04 at 03:11 PM

Must drop verse in 4318 minutes after check in.

girlmerkinu has ACCEPTED this battle on 12-22-04 03:17 PM.

workin all day in this hot heat no money humiditity killin me
sweat rollin down my cheek pickin cotton brush hurtin my feet
screamin in agaony as i see my mom being raped
seeing terror in her face i think its too late too escape
never learned to read or write never all because im not white
work in the sun daily but i dont see the light shine
pray to the good lord above me to see one dove tongiht
mos white bring me down i wanna c 1 make me take flight

kkkhater has ACCEPTED this battle on 12-22-04 03:32 PM.

I lie her on my back starring at the sky wondering why I have not yet hanged,
But everday when I carry these chains it does nothin to me but put my soul into a constant shame,
I can't take this life no more for I have no family or I neither knew my mother,
I take you back when I was a kid only when

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vs super

http://community.rapverse.com/showb...918915&posted=1

shit messed up here is my full drop

I lie her on my back starring at the sky wondering why I have not yet hanged,
But everday when I carry these chains it does nothin to me but put my soul into a constant shame,
I can't take this life no more for I have no family or I neither knew my mother,
I take you back when I was a kid only when I was only about three,
I neither knew my father who was sold to the devil,
but now I have to use my knowledge to get myself out with a shovel,
everyone asks me why I do not run,
but instead I rather say that I have made a pack with the indiana devil.

__________________
vs super

http://community.rapverse.com/showb...918915&posted=1

upppppin vote on this........................................

uppin this one lets get some votes up in her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

__________________
vs super

http://community.rapverse.com/showb...918915&posted=1

Voted For: girlmerkinu

kkkhater:
ok first of all....you need work on stucture n vocabulary and you need help with a more consistant flow...your wordplay, well you didnt have any kool words played in there....try working on wordplay or something...might give you a better grip on the topical...no hate

Girlmerkinu
not bad...first topical ive seen from you to be honest..besides your audios..lol...nice vocab in the ender....nice wordplay...very well done stucture and a decent flow to your verse, there isnt to much to say that was crap cuz shit girls merkin catsno hate pz

vote: girl

Voted For: girlmerkinu

girl win's this basiclly cuz she rhymed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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upppppppppppiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.....

Voted For: girlmerkinu



I lie her on my back starring at the sky wondering why I have not yet hanged,
But everday when I carry these chains it does nothin to me but put my soul into a constant shame,
I can't take this life no more for I have no family or I neither knew my mother,
I take you back when I was a kid only when

^^^^^^^^^^^^ NO THIS WASNT AN GOOD VERSE...NO EXPRESSIONS (FULLY)...NO CREATIVITY .........MAYNE ELEVate in every aspect of an TOPICAL battle............KID WORK ON STRUTURE........







workin all day in this hot heat no money humiditity killin me
sweat rollin down my cheek pickin cotton brush hurtin my feet
screamin in agaony as i see my mom being raped
seeing terror in her face i think its too late too escape
never learned to read or write never all because im not white
work in the sun daily but i dont see the light shine
pray to the good lord above me to see one dove tongiht
mos white bring me down i wanna c 1 make me take flight
^^^^^^^^^^^OK I LIKE THIS ONE ELEVATE THOUGH...FLOW WAS THERE..........EXPRESSION AND FEELINGS WAS THERE...........CREATIVITY ELEVATE


OVERALL= THIS IS AN ONE-SIDED BATTLE. CLEARLY GIRL WON THIS BY FLOW...EXPRESSIONS........AND FEELINGS............KKKHATER WORK ON STRUTURE AND EVERY TOPICAL BATTLE THAT HAS TO OFFER...YOU CAME WEAK FAM............NO CREATIVITY.........IMAGINARY........EXPRESSION WASNT THAT GOOD...........


V/GIRL

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Voted For: girlmerkinu

vote is for you......way better...other person was juss weak

Voted For: girlmerkinu

easy battle

imagery- GMU, ok imagary. i can see wut u r sayin and i can feel the opression. so good job. KKKH, bad imagery, wuznt feelin there at all.
vocab- GMU, u won this becuz u kept it comin, KKKH, u would have got this, but u fell off in the end
structure- GMU, easy one, decent structure, KKKH, work on ya structure.
flow- GMU, your vocab and structure helped it flow better. KKKH, fell of way too many times, work on it.
originality- GMU, not much but there wuz more than KKKH. KKKH, u had it, but yet agin u fell off.

GMU, overall pretty good for ya first topical. increase ya vocab, and overall just keep elevatin.

KKKH, u need to work on everything. U came out decent, but ultimately fell off, work on structure mostly, and everythin else.

No Hate Just An Honest Vote

v/girlmerkinu

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