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02-15-05, 12:44 AM | #1 | |
Tight.
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When The Sun Rises....
IP:
When the Sun rises….
Early one morning as I awoke to the call of a mockingbird Straining myself to get out the warm depths of my bed, to the beautiful songs I heard Cheerful morning it seemed well enough, a new day to begin my long strenuous day The night now gone, I lay awake, bright-eyed at the world that lay…. ………… Stretching, yawning, tired, but awake none the less Earlier that night, feeling of conquering came over, completed Quest What did I do of that night, to feel whole again, no more sleepless nights Undressed, and turned on the shower, cold water emerged, no light Taking my dark, cold shower I wondered always pondered It’s like my mind was dirty and taken out, and laundered Washed and dried out, gone with the wind, brought up with the sun Never lived a ruff life, never lived an easy one, old, but young Thoughts arriving and departing, my mind like a terminal Caught, eyes darting, avoiding the foreseen, yet inevitable …………… Brain at respite, I found what I was seeking, reconciliation Tranquility, disturbed only by the most strident of motion Could only conceive what I contemplated was ease in one thought At rest I laid, once again, but clean, shower done, a drought ………. Confused, but early one morning I awoke to the call of a mockingbird Peculiarly, it seems the indistinguishable elderly thing I’ve done, for years untold… drop a link with-in 24 hours or this will be closed... http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=165166 http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=170910 Last edited by intensify effect : 02-18-05 at 08:02 AM. |
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02-15-05, 10:47 AM | #2 | |
Tight.
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IP:
Upping this.,,,,,,,,,
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02-15-05, 10:54 AM | #3 | |
E-Style, Bitch.
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IP:
It was straight
Dope in parts, but a little too corny in others (no hate) for the most part is was deep, an you stayed right on point...an topic throughout, enjoyable, just went off on some corny shit here n there, but i liked it 7.5/10 Good lookin out famlay, keep em comin'
__________________
People Hate What They Can't Conquer |
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02-17-05, 04:19 PM | #4 | |
Tight.
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IP:
^Thanks for the feedback, upping this.
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02-17-05, 05:15 PM | #5 | ||
New to RV
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IP:
That right there was deep I'm give it like 8/10
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02-17-05, 06:05 PM | #6 | |
Tight.
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IP:
Thanks for the breif feedback.
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02-17-05, 09:13 PM | #7 | |
Tight.
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IP:
Feedback! Leave links I'll Of course hit all your links back up.
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02-18-05, 08:01 AM | #8 | |
Banned
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IP:
drop a link with-in 24 hours or this will be closed... http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=165166 http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=170910 |
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02-19-05, 12:26 AM | #9 | |
New to RV
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IP:
my nigga Given.
haha you know my thoguhts on the other site. |
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02-20-05, 05:21 PM | #10 | |
Tight.
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IP:
^I'm going to kill you LOL.
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02-21-05, 10:00 PM | #11 | |
Tight.
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IP:
Damnit all.................................
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