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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
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08-25-05, 05:45 PM
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#1
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The Paragraph President
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Split Optics- First Solo Piece
IP:
www.soundclick.com/Paranoid05
alright this is a cool lil track, if you heard my track wit tizzle and then you play this tell me if i did good for elevation please. Beat: The Roots- What They Do alright i put this together in a few hours so..listen give me feed thanks. Links coming.
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08-25-05, 09:52 PM
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#2
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The Paragraph President
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IP:
http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2393301
http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2393312
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Last edited by Paranoid : 08-25-05 at 09:55 PM. |
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08-25-05, 11:10 PM
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#3
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Seattle Hat Wit A Lean
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IP:
weerd i like the beat
intro is is kidna ehh though...not too big of a deal your vocals could benefit from being turned up a lil bit... lyrically wise its not bad but your emotion really needs to be upped it just sounds like your reading it off something and the flow bores me a bit, like it could be more interesting....mix it up here and there wit some nice multis or something, nah mean? but yea, i think this could be an ok track if those two thigns were fixed... emotion and flow other than that its coo quality is nice, wish mines was like that  keep working though
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 --------------------------- Lucky Boy Beats: Owner & Producer http://www.myspace.com/luckyboybeats ---------------------------------------------- Gunn Play: Rv's Original Duo Dash Canceling To A Computer Near You MAS ON EM! 4 LIFE |
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08-26-05, 01:51 AM
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#4
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The Paragraph President
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IP:
thanks alot tizz, i did use multi's and i used quiote a few if you read the lyrics there.
yea i'm gonna try n mix my flow around some more next track i wanna do a lil track to The Uppercut beat by 2pac, emotion im not quite understanding how to do it yet.
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08-26-05, 08:33 AM
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#5
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Hell yeah
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IP:
beat is iight, aint my type of beat, flow is good but could be better, lyrics are pretty dope, flow is kinda rushed but u atleas hit the snares at the right time, emotion is good but could be better too, but yeah u elevated man i heard ur last peace, quality is pretty good, u should do a chorus man
overall u elevated -Speats- |
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08-26-05, 05:37 PM
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#6
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L.E
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IP:
A'ight listening...
Beat is trippy...first thing...Vocals are loud...long ass intro...you shoulda started near the 20 second mark...flow is lacking...your lines on long enough...Your voice isn't hitting the snare really at all...emotion needs to be hugely upped...I'm feelin the topic for sure...lyrics are straight...just keep workin at it man  |
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08-26-05, 05:43 PM
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#7
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The Paragraph President
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IP:
wtf is a snare?
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08-27-05, 05:17 PM
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#8
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Artist, that simple
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IP:
beat choice is good.....
Long as intro..............seriously, i agree with Limited, i believe you should have started around 25 seconds into the beat Overall - song was ok, but too short.............in the intro, vocal volume needs to be turned down......Vocab was good and storyline was well develop, but your delivery needs to be more complex....more emotion............ outro - good message..... 7/10 - decent track...
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Grim |
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08-28-05, 12:09 AM
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#9
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C.hristopher S.ean D.abatos
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IP:
lol ahhhh intro is effin long as hell lol.. lyrically it is good fam.. just seriously up ur emotion.. haha same with ur text lol.. but yeah.. n have better delivery.. than u'll be like me.. COOL ASIAN
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08-28-05, 05:23 PM
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#10
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The Paragraph President
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IP:
word
Cool Asian. upfoshizzle.
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08-28-05, 05:31 PM
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#11
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Bow Chicka Bow Wow
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IP:
lyrics is coo, but mic presences and emotion is lackin....flow is weak, your speeding up or slowing down to try and catch the snare...you need to make everything flow smoothly make everythin fit evenly. ect...
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08-28-05, 10:30 PM
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#12
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The Paragraph President
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IP:
i already know that,
if you wanna help say something no one else said yet.
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08-29-05, 10:19 AM
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#13
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Whys That?
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IP:
Loud vocals , beat is diffrent.lol.
Appraoch is ok could of come a bit smother.Flow isnt good. Emotion is lacking. |
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08-29-05, 11:54 AM
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#14
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New to RV
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IP:
aint really like this beat
funny ass intro show some emotion man, speak up dog deep lyrics i guess holla at me |
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08-29-05, 07:53 PM
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#15
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The Paragraph President
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IP:
^how is my into funny?
you musta listened to the wrong one.
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