Lets face it whack fucks will erase it but my wisdom is bright
And the damn system is white so its all right hell I have to fight
Respect damn its whack and pathetic how blacks don’t get credit
Stale face and shook to read pale face books yet they say energetic
Hell I don’t get it how they feel we lost if they’re not boss political
Turns critical description and decision is like Egyptian religion pivotal
They want to Pharoah us and slave the brave thank god for Abe
White boys treat me like toys wind me up and I walk and talk and behave
Slavery was a white faggot act a maggot attack on black decent folks
Arrived in tribes yet survived after whip lash nowadays hear frequent jokes
HA! HA! They’ve slip a lot got the evils writing HIP HOP
And that’s my art wonder will that be stolen also? Behind a slip knot
Many of us was hung just so they can claim our fame and inventions
I flow alert but they go berserk calling me whack, lame dimensions
For me, my conduct beseems a corrupt scene on the streets
Because I was abused and used as a slave for white mankind defeats
The purpose of democracy hell I am not free

Was Pretty Nice..flowed well in my eyes...the Multi's were present in general..but nothing really made me just go WOW...but still a few lines were like..think about it..my favorite lines are these..

Respect damn its whack and pathetic how blacks don’t get credit
Stale face and shook to read pale face books yet they say energetic
Hell I don’t get it how they feel we lost if they’re not boss political
Turns critical description and decision is like Egyptian religion pivotal

^ that stuck out to me..specially the last 2 bars ...those were like..hmm dude has a bit of knowledge..so yea...overall..
7.6/10 the only thing i see that could be worked on is wording and take out a few filler words....besides that its pretty nice..

This was an ok drop, the flow was good, you can up on your vocab though, your structure was good, even though the concept was kid of played you got to the point and made it your own, good drop

__________________

This was good had good flow and everything but the concept was played out nah mean?...But good drop though word up..

__________________
mystery Is a Freak!!

ITawAPuddyKat: Yeah, I guess. But I won't be a Lesbo for life.
Smartone Freal: oh so u DO have plans of turnin str8
ITawAPuddyKat: Well Yes, Yes I do.
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: Lol, all smiles aren't we? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol yea i cant hide what i think bout u
Smartone Freal:
ITawAPuddyKat: ...Oh, what DO you think about me? Lol
Smartone Freal: lol sorry thats private
ITawAPuddyKat: EWWWWWWW..*Sigged*

blah good flow and good multis but as far as rhymes they were all played you coem pretty played most of the time so work on creativity u need to just suprise us and do something original so this peice wasnt that great i do think youre better than u generally get credit for though

__________________

played out mean you're heard the rhymes before nothing played out about this post maybe forgotten but not played out and the never used yall feel me?

my link (http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2412005)