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Old 02-03-07, 04:09 PM   #1
Zone Out
Power Hungry
 
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From: Westside Detroit
My Crazy Ass Friday Night.

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Aww man.. I had the craziest night last night
I swear.. you NEVER know what will happen in the streets of Detroit.


It started off normal as hell.. I was at the gas station puttin gas in my car and I seen this Cross Fire drivin up onto an island.. then it backed up and drove back up it and hit a pole... and it just stayed there
and I was lookin like WTF?!?!
So I drive around to see if the person is ok and its an old ass man. And when I say old I mean OLD.. like late 60's early 70's old.
so I ask if he was ok and what he was tryin to do and he replied.. "I was just tryin to make a right turn" and Im like "what? man you're stuck up on the island you cant go no where.." and he's like "Im just sittin here"

now At this time I already feel obligated to help this elderly black man cause he's obviously senile.

so I ask him where's he's tryin to go and he paused for a second.. and then was like "Im gonna follow you"

lmfao.. as funny as it sounds it was a plan. I got him off of the island and he followed me away from some of the traffic of the main street we was on. Then I called the police. While Im waitin on the hooks to come why did this old fart start blowin his horn at me and backin up and rammin the back of my car!!!

I get out and ask him what he was doin and if he's alright
he gets MAD at me and say "are YOU doing alright!?" I couldnt help but to laugh.. then I told him that I called some hel;p for him to help him get home.. and he was about to pull off on me. I had to stop him.. but right at the moment the police rolled up and they handled the situation.. I left after that.


Now.. I make it back to the block I be posted up on and I see this girl that I know walkin down the street with her hair all messed up cryin and shit. So the girl that was in the car with me at the time got out to see what was wrong with her.. and she says that her boyfriend just beat her ass..... AGAIN. This is new to me, cause I spent the summer in cincinnati so I never knew about this.. but apparently everyone in the hood knows about me except me. so AFTER she just got her ass whooped she was about to walk BACK around the corner to the nigga's house. so I drive up to her and tell her to get in the car.. and as she's walkin her boyfriend runs up like "HEY HEY HEY HEY BITCH WHERE YOU GOING!?!?!" cracks her in the head and snatches her out the car. So I throw the shit in park and tell that nigga to calm down and dont be snatchin nobody out my god damn car. He like "Im sorry Im not gonna mess up your car let me just get this bitch out" and I notice his boy was lookin at me all stupid..so I grabbed my burner out the trunk and cock it and shit and ask that nigga what was up what he lookin at. and he just turned around and walked away. But damn, people been tellin me that that was an on going thing. He always beats her ass and she always goes back to him so I guess thats their thing. Im not goin get involved in that shit cause I'll end up poppin him or one of his boys and I'll have to leave the hood AGAIN.

Now.. onto my NEXT story that happened that night. These girls call me to come pick them up form this party. I arrive and I see a mothafucka drivin all crazy and then hoppin out the driver seat with a fuckin K! so I pull the fuck off.. pull around the corner and my boy load his shit up and I load my shit up.... I call the girls to tell them to come the fuck on Im not about to drive in the line of fire and I head "bRrRrRrRrRrRAaAaAaAaAaAt!" me and my nigga like oh shit!!!
Then like a whole crowd of people just started runnin towards us and shit so I start lookin for the nigga with the gun and I start shootin at his ass. My nigga KGB pull off and Im dumpin out the window at whoever I think look suspicious.
And then why the fuck we see the girls just standin on the corner lookin all stupid and shit. I yell "yall bitches get the fuck in the car with yall dumb asses.." and they come runnin over and we pulled off. They told us that 2 gangs started fightin in the party and one got slammed through a table (lmao @ that) so he called some niggas up there with guns and they had started shootin.. They dont think nobody got hit though.. we make it safely back to the hood but now me and my nigga got 2 hoes in the car.

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

We go to the liquor store and get some seagrams vodka.. EXTRA SMOOTH.. I swear it look like we had a gallon of that shit. we was fuuuuuuuuucked up.
Im in the front seat with this bitch tryin to get her to give me some head and shit haha.. but she tryin to kiss me I was like you can kiss me on my dick!. You know whne you drunk you say what ever the fuck you feel like sayin..

but then the story has a twist to it.
My nigga's brother came outside on some drunk shit opening up my door sayin he'll beat everyone's ass in the car
So my boy got out and punched him in the face.. but when he got out the car his gun was on his lap and it feel on the ground. So then he picked it u[ and shot his brother in the foot!!
I get out like "WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA, K!! calm down man calm down man.. you justs hot ya brother in the foot" and he;s like "I dont give a fuck, I told him not to fuck with me!!. I dont wanna have to kill my brother"

Im thinkin in my head "aww man, Now I wont be able to get no pussy tonight"

but anyway.. Im tired of typin now.. the rest of the night was involed duckin the hooks and talkin the hoes home
The End.
crazy ass night though, right?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by strobe
If you do kegel excercises, you would be able to do something similar without having to hold your tip shut with your hand. After you've been doing them, hold off ejaculating as long as you can to really let the pressure build and then aim for your girlfriend's eye and let 'er rip.. You might get lucky and shoot her eye out. That's probably exaggerating it a bit, but it will still be hilarious
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Old 02-03-07, 04:42 PM   #2
Mad Dog
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"i like driving in my car",
"do do do do do do do do",
"it's not quite a jaguar",
"do do do do do do do do",
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Quote:
Originally Posted by High Dro
furthermore, june 3rd is the only good day to be born

^ Amen Brother ^

Quote:
Originally Posted by ∆ P E X X
i'm still tryin to figure out how bein born in another country makes somebody fake.

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Old 02-03-07, 05:00 PM   #3
Zone Out
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From: Westside Detroit
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My story was nothing like that.
Get your finger out your butt.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by strobe
If you do kegel excercises, you would be able to do something similar without having to hold your tip shut with your hand. After you've been doing them, hold off ejaculating as long as you can to really let the pressure build and then aim for your girlfriend's eye and let 'er rip.. You might get lucky and shoot her eye out. That's probably exaggerating it a bit, but it will still be hilarious
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Old 02-03-07, 05:10 PM   #4
.Eternal.
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.......................ok
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Old 02-03-07, 05:48 PM   #5
Mad Dog
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From: Crawley, England
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zone Out
My story was nothing like that.
Get your finger out your butt.


sorry man jus reading that entire story for some reason reminded me of that suggs song...don't ask why...jus know thatit did...

wanna know what happened on Friday wit me?...no...fuck you ya gonna find out anyways...nothing...there ya go

but lol @ u callin the old bill...you quick to push them 3 digits aint ya breh
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Quote:
Originally Posted by High Dro
furthermore, june 3rd is the only good day to be born

^ Amen Brother ^

Quote:
Originally Posted by ∆ P E X X
i'm still tryin to figure out how bein born in another country makes somebody fake.

R.I.P OMB

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Old 02-03-07, 05:34 PM   #6
P To Tha R!
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LOOOL nigg..only the hood mayn..ONLY the hood
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Old 02-03-07, 05:50 PM   #7
Zone Out
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From: Westside Detroit
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the old man was senile and lost.
He needed some help so I called the police waited til they got there and left

I felt better cause I know he didnt get hurt
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Quote:
Originally Posted by strobe
If you do kegel excercises, you would be able to do something similar without having to hold your tip shut with your hand. After you've been doing them, hold off ejaculating as long as you can to really let the pressure build and then aim for your girlfriend's eye and let 'er rip.. You might get lucky and shoot her eye out. That's probably exaggerating it a bit, but it will still be hilarious
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Old 02-03-07, 05:55 PM   #8
Mad Dog
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From: Crawley, England
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zone Out
the old man was senile and lost.
He needed some help so I called the police waited til they got there and left

I felt better cause I know he didnt get hurt


and thats word

although if he seemed to come across as senile...why the hell was man behind a wheel??? Thats SCREAMING out RTA in my eyes...he musta forgot he had his license revoked i guess
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Quote:
Originally Posted by High Dro
furthermore, june 3rd is the only good day to be born

^ Amen Brother ^

Quote:
Originally Posted by ∆ P E X X
i'm still tryin to figure out how bein born in another country makes somebody fake.

R.I.P OMB

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Old 02-03-07, 06:06 PM   #9
Ysdat
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I stopped reading at "I called the police".
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Old 02-03-07, 06:20 PM   #10
P To Tha R!
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From: Brooklyn, NYC
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is that a lil bowwow move in ure sig? lol but if u read on nigga called the police for the old man..
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Old 02-03-07, 07:48 PM   #11
B. Magik
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From: STL
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Lmfao word at "You can kiss me on my dick"
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CHECK THE FUCKING BEATS.

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Old 02-04-07, 12:52 AM   #12
Logic The Goonie
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You really and truly expect us to believe this story?
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Old 02-04-07, 11:14 AM   #13
Zone Out
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From: Westside Detroit
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Logic/Socrates
You really and truly expect us to believe this story?

you dont have to believe this shit
I went through it all on friday
shit was craaaazy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by strobe
If you do kegel excercises, you would be able to do something similar without having to hold your tip shut with your hand. After you've been doing them, hold off ejaculating as long as you can to really let the pressure build and then aim for your girlfriend's eye and let 'er rip.. You might get lucky and shoot her eye out. That's probably exaggerating it a bit, but it will still be hilarious
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Old 02-04-07, 01:16 AM   #14
Mayne Event
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Yeha man I had that shit too... but it was called gta san andreas... I just saved the game and shut it off for the night though
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Old 02-04-07, 01:20 AM   #15
pen pusher
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sorry
i ain't readin' all that shit
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