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06-25-07, 09:12 PM | #1 | |
New to RV
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The Cutting Edge
IP:
Dedicated to a true Story:
I love you and miss you Kayla... "The Cutting Edge" Slowly cutting her pain away, As she cuts her life away; Forgetting those who love her and slowly passes her pain Cuts herself for every little mistake she does, as she hates her And as she can see what she's become, the reflection of the razor Where've you gone my Love? You've faded slowly, i'm sorry i didn't say bye I barely could've sawl you for the last time, Nor could i cry I've loved you from hello, I was addicted to your voice, and your laughter And my only motivation to wake up, was my reasoning for you to go after I miss you, your we're my first love, but you went through to much love And as every thing that didn't go right, you slit your arms, and left me above A best friend to many, and my love, and little things that she hated As the sorrowly days go by dreadfully..As she was always appreciated She slowly cuts her wrists, and doesn't know it, but keeps Cutting As she thinks she can change the Present, from the future to something Slit.. Slit... Drip.. Drip.. She drops the blade, and calls me, and crying sobing, and writes a letter she states she's sorry for everything, and makes me promise to not forget her I cry, while she falls, and drops her phone, and is knocked out.. As i panic, but i can't move, and words cannot come out my mouth.. Tears slowly drip from my face upon, and my tears turn into her blood And as her blood drips from her wings, and she flys up above As i cry all night and day, till this day, wishing that was my life sacrificed Because blood & eternal happiness of love, can never have a price... Slit.. Slit.. Slit.. Drip.. Drip.. Drip.. R.I.P Kayla..I'll see you soon..
__________________
God.Status
1X RBFL Topical Champ.
1X RA Middle-Weight ABL Champ, I'm Bezerk |
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06-25-07, 09:12 PM | #2 | |
New to RV
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IP:
Links'll go here
.http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post3173689 .http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post3173690
__________________
God.Status
1X RBFL Topical Champ.
1X RA Middle-Weight ABL Champ, I'm Bezerk Last edited by Elusive : 06-25-07 at 09:18 PM. |
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06-25-07, 09:18 PM | #3 | |
New to RV
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IP:
Alright,
Please leave feed, this is an topical, so idunno if some of you would get this. Bump
__________________
God.Status
1X RBFL Topical Champ.
1X RA Middle-Weight ABL Champ, I'm Bezerk |
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06-25-07, 09:57 PM | #4 | |
..........
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IP:
real deep....i like this......i dont do much topicals.....i still thought this was very good though.....keep writing ~1~
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06-25-07, 11:16 PM | #5 | |
New to RV
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IP:
Woot!
HOF? I think so, rofl jk.
__________________
God.Status
1X RBFL Topical Champ.
1X RA Middle-Weight ABL Champ, I'm Bezerk |
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06-26-07, 02:53 PM | #6 | ||
Human Crack in The Flesh.
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IP:
deep...mayne...
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06-26-07, 06:55 PM | #7 | |
New to RV
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IP:
Thnx,
If there was a topical forum on here, i would murder.
__________________
God.Status
1X RBFL Topical Champ.
1X RA Middle-Weight ABL Champ, I'm Bezerk |
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07-01-07, 05:43 PM | #8 | |
New to RV
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IP:
..Mhm...
.....
__________________
God.Status
1X RBFL Topical Champ.
1X RA Middle-Weight ABL Champ, I'm Bezerk |
|
07-02-07, 04:15 PM | #9 | |
New to RV
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IP:
dang eerie stuff man. dat pic got me. but this stuff is killer mang. i like dis post alot. the storytellin and the feelin just flowed out. keep it up homboi
peace |
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07-19-07, 03:40 PM | #10 | |
Flyweight
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IP:
ok ok concept overall was deep..... good visual here...... the cuttin and drippin had a lil effect.... made me bite my lip a lil like ouch
structure was decent, flow stretched but i took it as a poem instead to get rid of the flow ish ....... couple fo metas in there, simple.... somewhat , for the most part everything was put together, pretty sad story esp since its true, if theres anyone that knows about loss its u and i feel u since ive been there.......keep doin u man.... good piece..... ill rate it as a poem and give it a thumbs up man.... |
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07-29-07, 03:56 AM | #11 | |
New to RV
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IP:
this was real deep...i feel you
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