Yo, the talk was heavy, didn’t think it would end like this//
Had me yearning for just one more single kiss//
I wanted to give you paradise ma never wanted to hurt or diss//
Making love all night, hear you scream... you’re in bliss//
But it’s over now, watched you get on that plane//
And I promised myself that I wouldn’t let this drive me insane//
But I love you girl and this time I truly mean it//
I hit you with blind love, but now I wish you would have seen it//
Want you to unpack, but there’s no stoppin’ now//
Thought we had a plan together, but I see how it’s goin’ down//
Was it ‘cause of my mind manipulation//
Or breakdown in communication//
I need an answer girl, your silence has got me pacin’//
I wanted to love and cherish, ma you know I kept you laced//
To hold, to honor, about to put down straight c-notes on our place//
What you want more land?//
Baby why the sudden change in plans?//
I cooked, worked, and cleaned, any woman would kill for this man//
Not once have I cheated//
Other numbers have always been deleted//
Other females just couldn’t see it//
You said it yourself ma, with me your life’s completed//

(CHORUS from girl) Now boy, I know I said some things/
I like the house that you bought, and that diamond ring/
But it seems like we're based on material things/
I just gotta go, I gotta use my wings/

Hey love, remember all the long walks in the park//
Or do you remember when we use to play after dark//
Or do you remember we had silly nick names that we'll never say in public//
Look at that smile girl, see you know how you love it//
So why throw away what it took so hard to build//
I was your night in shining armor, let me protect you with the shield//

(CHORUS from girl) x 1

But baby I’m on my knees at night//
Candles lit have the room fully bright//
As I pray to God:

Lord you said ask, and you shall deliver...
But my soul quivers....
I’m cold and lonely, why let your child shiver....
You said you wouldn’t bare anything on us that we can’t stand...
But this woman’s love has me a confused man...
Please God find the strength deep inside this G....
Reach into my soul and please help guide me.....

I’m willing to do anything girl, throw away the watch, there’s no more chains//
Full blast, im’a switch lanes//
I’m here but it’s too late, you on the plane//

To Be Continued...............................

Why are y'all sleepin' on the threads? I need some major uppin' on this shit.

shits hot keep it up

Aight aside from the Biological cock sucking from the mc above me.......
This was JUST A SORRY ASS WANNA BE LL COOL J....song
"showing the softer side of an mc"....
nigga please....
you know you a real fruit cake on the inside....
FAKE ASS JA RULE....with a fucking CHORUS thinking you online "LIVE" rappin this shit....
this shit is WACK & WEAK....and today sure aint Feb the 14th....fruit loops...

Work on it


Peace.....
1.........

damm, first you get a weak reply, then you get this bitch talking shit... lol... it's a joke ain't it!
Yo personally dawg, this here's too soft for my taste... though I did like this line... "I hit you with blind love, but now I wish you would have seen it"... I ain't that heartless...
Now alot of this (rhymes, wordplay, vocab) was pretty simple, that's a weak point, and also the flow could have been better paced... it lacks rhythm... in my opinion, cats don't usually take a liking to topics like this... so if you are posting something like it, you should try to make it as good as you can... and I know you can do better then this... just keep working on it man, peace

Peace

Thanks for all the ups... but for real, I don't need none of y'all tellin' me this shit is too weak, or too soft. I'm just showing that I can do all types of rhymes, different styles. That shit ain't just all talkin' about one thing, it's about life, y'all feel me? Anyways, check out my other threads if you tryin' to see some ""hard"" shit. Otherwise, the rest of y'all... keep uppin'.