this is sumtin i wrote to express some emotions i had after findin out im bout to be a Dad

my pulse bursts wit the surge of a free flowin river
but my heart thirst for the courage to eaze growin shivers
overwhelmin emotions start swellin til oceans explode
into a stream down my face cuz its seems that my fate is unknown
then at this moment in time when im hopin that im, man enough
somethin inside my heart cause pride to spark, flames flarin up
til the burnin inside starts turnin my pride , to a devotion
that soothe the emotions and truth becomes open and clear to me
now its clear that these doubts and fearz i see r past reflections
of ol' dads deceptions but that perception is not what i am
I am not that ol' man i will stop and ill stand for what i beleive
show love to my seed so he grows up to know hes worth more then gold
so i store these cold, thoughtz that r caught inside as sores i hold
to remind me of whats been done, so i always will love my son

up this bitch one time before i get off for the nite..........holla back yall......i reply to too many peoples shit not to get the favor in return...........if ya like it say it if ya dont say it loud

a yo micdarreal, yo bitch ......

i dont give a fuck if u goin be a dad
cause u goin be one faggot that baby wished he never had,
how u get a bitch when u cant even cum
after i kill u, im a kill your son
ha,ha,ha............. im ruthless
your best friend,soilder22

This was nice duke i liked every bit of it good way to express ya emotions nice job dukes 1..

this was nice, nice vocab nice flow, you got you point out. it might have been better if i knew the feeling but i havent been there yet.

go check out mine " my light"

Wow, well great peace, thats known...

And congrats man. You seem to be really looking forward to it, thats great. Once again, congratulations.

Wussup pimpin', Damn I almost was in the same position (girl's period was crazy late) but it didn't happen, but durng that time I felt this right here 'cuz thats the type of shit you be thinking. You expressed your feelings through words good, and I felt the rhyme style you was using here. Tight verse and Congrads, dog

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Bang On The Table Productions

thankx bruklor D dizzle and the rest.....but to soldier.....take this shit to front lines if ya think ya got the skill

Nice kidd, glad to hear that...



The piece opened with a feel to it, very nicely done opener, the flow was tweeked with the nicely placed internals as well, a good way to open this piece.




I know exactly what you feel dawg, it's a great feeling, but there is the elusive feel of "what now?" It's nicely summed up here on how you feel and what your goals are to work with that, again nice flow and use of internals.



A good ending as well, the feel behind it is a good one and I liked that for the better part of this piece, the flow was more so the backbone to this piece along with the emotions you were going through, a very good piece about that...

congrats man,

love..

damn hell of a break down fam....thankx....think thatz the longest reply i ever had...^^^^

^^^^^^^^^^^^

any though u played ma first rhyme i aint no hater man yo shit was deep
i was feelin it yo
ma girl think she pregnant and im 15
man.keep doing yo thing

Yo Mic... CONGRADULATIONs.... and Nice Piece too... One

good one dog, im a father, i got a few peices out there about my son [the lil don] one of them is gettin put to a beat right now, but i have to wait till eveyones gone to record it, got ppl sleepin all the time when i awake there asleep so it dont werk out, plus i put alotta emotion into it, its to the beat of B.I.G.s ready to die, anyway, as for critique it was short, ur lines were a few sylables too lon, it didnt match werd, but it was a good drop ill up it for you

nice shit manye, take care of ya kid yo,
con grats

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D.L.W