the phone rang, there was not light outside
the voice was the hospital on the other side
is this the parents of Ray they asked
filled with concern his mother gasped
woke up his father in a flash
the voice said hesitantly, your son was in a car crash
he is in serious condition
he might not last

they hung up the phone and ran to there car
the hospital only a mile seemed very far
the woman who hit him was alnight at a bar

with nothing but death in her mind and the conclusion suicide
she hit him head on parts in the air as they collide
like the water of ocean hitting the tide

he died over night seconds before they came
the father was crying the mother insane
how did he die the drunk driver they blame
how can we go home it won't be the same

morning arose and you knew it was gloomy
the day was quiet and flowers werent blooming

two days later was little rays funeral
resting in his casket at a young numeral
his life once existed but now terminal
why did he die and lives is that drunk criminal
but they knew to be rational

they say there last goodbye to there son as they lower him to the ground
they cry cause they miss him and every action and sound
goodbye ray they whisper as he moves down
with the last i love you

friends and family with frowns

Damn str8 from the heart. This was a good piece. Sounds like you're doin poetry than rhymin though

thank you...the whol poetry thing was what i was sorta going for

nice content..

..but yeah, no flow.

Nice drop i was feelin this

thanxz Bash and Nuclear for your input it's appreciated......

it was a nice storyline..
a twist at the end would
have been nice...i dont
know how you could twist
it though. it was very
straightforward...kept me
interested the entire way
through. flow was nice. forget
these other kids. lol. keep
it dope ! i like it...

__________________

thank U!!!!