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Old 05-15-03, 01:13 AM   #1
LiViD
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Emotions

IP:

No self confidence talk can bring me release
from the yearing and hurting to join the deceased
Can't lie and pretend thing work themselves out
filled with doubt as I scream out and I shout
to anyone who'll listen tears glisten
as they fall down my face like a waterfall
thought I had everything, have nothing at all
build walls to shelter myself from the reckoning
beckoning, my future as it draws near dissecting
my personality traits faults and failures revealed
wound never heal as dark secrets concealed
yet out in the open, whole world is broken
act like a giant, know I'm internally soft spoken
hopin, yet tokin away all my aspirations
motivation and perfection leave lacerations
expectations and damnation next condesation
sweat breeds and feeds upon itself on my brow
stuck in the past, can't live in the now
somehow, struggle to continue breathing
and feeling, while inside my heart pumping yet bleeding
kneeling praying to an omnipotent being..may not exist
clenched fists from the parallel slit of the wrist
and wish for salvation, some sign to keep going
no slowing from potholes, meanwhile devoting
my life to an art in I am unsure at closing
that the tribulations, like the guy in Deliverance
won't have me squealing for mercy and at the same time moaning
make the pain stop why was I bestowed a cruel fate
elongate the desolation, welling up with self hate
debate, whether to keep striving, denying, lying
mask I wear cause I'm scared, don't want to come out of hiding
I feel so alive......yet I feel like dying
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Old 05-15-03, 03:57 AM   #2
Eviley
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Posts: 332
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this shit what straight up feeling... i liked it alot check out mine called Torn by two lovers.....straight uppin for you keep writing...
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Old 05-15-03, 10:30 PM   #3
LiViD
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don't sleep on this people.....give me some feedback.....I'll hit up yours if you hit up mine
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Old 05-15-03, 10:38 PM   #4
SiniX
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i dont know.......you got some potential....you need to ^^^^elevate though......play wit ya words.....use metaphors......jus get clever wit dat shit.....stop being all fuckin borin and shit.....i dont know ill peep some of your other shit later....elevate though definetly
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Old 05-15-03, 11:46 PM   #5
LiViD
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Hey...that's cool man....I do use mad metas in my battles.....but this was just some quick emotional shit

anyone else?
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Old 05-15-03, 11:47 PM   #6
SeVeR HeDDz
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Cool lil' piece..nothing to explode off of.. it was cool had flow
had a cool back up rhythum!!
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Old 05-16-03, 12:42 AM   #7
wolf at the door
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yo man that was tight. emotional. i felt this piece a lot. i've seen your battles and i know you can bring it. this was simple because thats all it had to be to get the point across. sometimes simple is better - thats the way i worked it on "the world iz flat" - simple rhymes work sometimes. i dug it....
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Old 05-16-03, 03:55 AM   #8
Young Cel
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From: Bay-Block
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it's ight man thats all ight
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