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Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio ![]() |
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jus a key style tryin to get a lil positive ffed back
IP:
i hate faggots that bottle there water..and fondle there daughters...run up on me and ill slaughter//
you and your crew,and whatevers left when im through..i take a breath at the pew..stayin drunk off tha brew...smoke tha earth that is blue// something readily complicated and cursed..rhymes that reverse..its time to disperse// this new affiliation..someones destination,,ruinin reputations...brewin in desilation...usin my hesitation..smoke hydros resination// wether it be opium or hash...i start smokin em then blast..after chokin em off grass...and pokin tha wrong ass// thought i was sober and my girl was next to me...thats why i quit takin ecstacy...anonymous girls sexin me...then my baby questions me...guess its destiny...i didnt fuck bethany...sayin im sorry and i best to be...she was lettin me...my boys bettin me// it wont last longer than a few months...it makes me stronger to smoke two blunts...its how i get through lunch...gave her a new hunch// tryin to tell her but she says keep on explainin...i stopped maintainin..while my life keeps on drainin...spittin this ish plain and simple to keep attainin. |
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IP:
hey i'm new ta the board-
liked yer flow / content too think it's good, but what do i know--i'm new & after my first battle the response isn't very good(weak beginning) MystiQuest vs s.e.n. http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=49472 check it out & let me/ and say what ya think---- also check out my first post ta open mic-- advise/critic----- Mystic Minstrel http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=50386 peace |
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IP:
structure make's it hard to read better bar lining would make it better.
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Guest
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IP:
i hate faggots that bottle there water..and fondle there daughters...run up on me and ill slaughter//you and your crew,and whatevers left when im through..i take a breath at the pew..stayin drunk off tha brew...smoke tha earth thats blue//something readily complicated and cursed..rhymes that reverse..its time to disperse//this new affiliation..someones destination,,ruinin reputations...brewin in desilation...usin my hesitation..smoke hydros resination//wether it be opium or hash...i start smokin em then blast..after chokin em off grass...and pokin tha wrong ass//thought i was sober and my girl was next to me...thats why i quit takin ecstacy...anonymous girls sexin me...then my baby questions me...guess its destiny...i didnt fuck bethany...sayin im sorry and i best to be...she was lettin me...my boys bettin me//it wont last longer than a few months...it makes me stronger to smoke two blunts...its how i get through lunch...gave her a new hunch//tryin to tell her but she says keep on explainin...i stopped maintainin..while my life keeps on drainin...spittin this ish plain and simple to keep attainin.
is this better?? |
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IP:
this is how I write and it help's structure
each line is the same length in the end this is just a better way of making it easier doesnt mean it's better just easier and so on blah blah blahb albh albhj SGdddddddddddddddddddddddddddd gdssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sgddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd ok that's just some info take it or leave it.1 and smaller line length couldnt hurt..good luck,,,,,, |
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IP:
uppin for replys ^^^^^^
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IP:
im gonna up this one again too, dont sleep~1~
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IP:
I didn't have aproblem following and thought it was ill nice work
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