(big font for varentao)


when the clock slid onto twelve he let his cigarette simmer-
settin it next to the palette and letting the ashes collect in the oils-
clippings of reviews lay shuffled amongst empty wine bottles-
bruised canvas prop each other up against the shadowed fireplace-
it is the rage of artistic feeling shoved into wages of the unkown-
behind a hung bedsheet water is boiling on the rusty stove-
he pays it no attention for there is a blank world in need of color-
mixing the new found combination of ashes and oil,he paints-
his mind fetches ideas of a love affair covered up by riches-
glancing at a faded picture,he remembers love can never be covered-
a streak of green lead by his imagination of a midsummer walk-
the mantel holds a vase of dried out daisies,but he can smell them still-
it is the sensation of being alive cooped into a rented apartment-
the brush strokes leave a story with every curve,even mistake, made-
he knows his mind wants to break out, to fill the blankness, but it cant-
bitter remarks are made at the brush as the canvas is tossed aside-
a fresh start, no green this time, a cloud of orange tones instead-
he smiles remembering the lust involving the fruit of happiness-
he has the wonders of Tibet hanging next to the window-
the treasures of Egypt gaze out while he sleeps in somber-
adventures along the Amazon stay by books of intelligence-
it is his colorful world inside an apartment of ruins lit by his gift-
his life in Italy is left to dry on the easel as he runs behind the bed sheet-


leave love, it'll be returned..

one love

wow....this piece is definitely good...


the imagery and the similes and metaphors are really awesome....
the flow was alright and the vocabs are well expressed....

dope shit...

if i only have time to break it down for u i will..but i aint have that much time


i really enjoyed readin this piece...keep droppin!

__________________
<br><br><center>- Shiznit -
- Tampons are still expensive -
- That's a Fact - </center>

real nice KEM....didnt kno u was on summin otha then rf, u shood post this up in the poetry section there u gon get lots of response, oh yea its mizery by the way.....


now for the critique of the piece.......it was amazaing, great topic good develpoment of it, the length was apporpriate and effective...the imagry was truly amazing and the expression was done beautifully....i really liked this

"a streak of green lead by his imagination of a midsummer walk-
the mantel holds a vase of dried out daisies,but he can smell them still-"

for some reason i reallly liked those lines, it just seemed to sum up the muse of an artist...anyways
great job
much luv
1

eyo eyo .... this poem was real coo man

keep what ya doin and speak from da heart fashow....

nice flow and everything man - i felt yu in this....

-1-

hey miz...ya i saw you on here earlier.....yep, i was on rb a while back before it went down, just bout the only other site ive been at consistanly besides rf.

anyhow, thanks for the love..

preacher i guess ya dont remember anyone on here....

kat this was nice describing the mind of a painter was done exceptionally well and you know you have my respect on it all
so with that being said keep doing you

^^Said it

Was good ish k.e.m
drop some more havent really seen you on
the poetry scene b4.

pz.

Heh, thanks (bigger font)..



Now i could be picky and pedantic and pick out certain things. But towards the end of the piece, i was taken aback.

Stunning imagery, constructed in a manner that though i can COULD feel akward, was not for me.

Most artists, not just painters, will 'get' this piece in a way. Though i saw it as fairly straight forward in one sense. It did have it's own edge and depth to it. A 'metaphorical' meaning, as well as one that is depicted what you describe (er, yeah....it's hard to explain...but i tihnk you know what i mean).

Really nice to see you back. And with Shiznit on board, we going to get this place up and running again. We need 'old liberos' like yourself....experienced and 'weathered' (in a good way). Thougn in now way putting down newer peeps. Who are just as important...hey, it's like when you're making a dish where all the ingredients are vital...*throws away shovel*..all this digging got me tired.../.(!)...


resp..