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Not real sure what to call this "Lady"?
IP:
I may not have the perfect waist size or have the perfect breast
But there is allure in all the curves and the shadows of my chest Darker secrets inside this mind that I might rather not confess... That makes me more than a girl. Less than a woman? The graceful lines of my fingers may reach into carelessly swept hair Still young enough to posses the glowing tints in my skin while bare Mature enough to know the shading, but still too nieve to compair That makes me more than a girl? Less than a woman. To know the difference in what's good and evil and take what's in between The appearance of these eyes yet older, too young for what they've seen So forcefully thrust into what is and isn't, then told to come clean... That makes me more than a girl? Less than a woman? Walking twoards my future calmly knowing I carry myself with pride Confidante and reassured I know who I am and what I posses inside Just hoping this world and all it holds will be ready when we collide That makes me more than a girl. Less than a woman. A lady... Dunno where this came from or why it came out... I think it was because some one did something that made me question a few things about my self. I was called a woman, and I some times disagree with that, I majority of the time disagree with girl... but I always always feel like a lady |
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IP:
well i dont know how old you r but if your not a woman yet,dont rush it when you hit 16 the years fly by before you know it youll be 25 wit kids or something else that wouldnt be planned,nice piece though,i like tha way you strung it together,nice flow,rhymed well,never doubt your mind or your body,you dont have to have the perfect waist tits face and ass to be beautiful,respect ya self ma,peace out boo.
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Special Ghost To Blow
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IP:
Well Structures All The Way Through Looking At It...
"Would" Instead Of "Might" In Your Third Line Sounds A Tad Better But Its Your Poem And Good So Far..... Decent Imagery In Your Fourth Line... ~To know the difference in what's good and evil and take what's in between The appearance of these eyes yet older, too young for what they've seen So forcefully thrust into what is and isn't, then told to come clean...~ Many Can Relate To Growing Up Quickly In Reference To Drugs..Child mollestation... Loss Of Familia..Anything For That Matter... Dunno where this came from or why it came out... ~The Way You Conduct Yourself In Certain Enviorments May~ ~Make You More Than A Girl....More Than A Woman~ ~It Came From Your Heart Girl..And You Cant Stop That~ ~Cant Deny Talent Either..Which You Displayed In Ways~ ~You Only Know How.....Alright Emotional Piece..Peace~ ~Content~ |
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IP:
yea I looked back at that and read it, it does sound better like that... thank you for the complements and the feedback. To Syndicate I'm 16... but I smell ya on that baby ish cause my best friend is a month older than me and got 5 weeks until her baby is due. But thank you very much, this was an emotional peice, an pretty much a peice that meant more to me than some of the others did... thanks (p.s. they'll get better commin outta a looooong writer's block) Peace
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"Cuz bruk said so"
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IP:
Nice peice thunda, you always have a way a catching my attention. Eye too young for what they have seen.... Now I can seriously relate to that line. Its my favorite line from this piece. Don't rush mija, take your time and enjoy your freedom, live to fulfill yourself. Cuz before you know it, you will be living for someone else, a husband, or children. I hope your writters block is lifeted, I look forward to reading more of your work..
__________________
FUCKA BABYLON BANDIT!!! |
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IP:
Thank you very much bud... Yea I was rushin when I was a lil younger, tryna be older, but now I have calmed down, got ahold of some goals and doin my best to reach them... thanks, peace
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IP:
I like that in all of this you consider yourself a lady. Even though you amy not feel like a woman and you've seen too much to consider yourself a "girl" you have pride in yourself. As far as your words go.........
"To know the difference in what's good and evil and take what's in between The appearance of these eyes yet older, too young for what they've seen So forcefully thrust into what is and isn't, then told to come clean..." ....theres mad truth in that loved the entire thing. If this was after a long bout wit writers block watch out!!!!! I look foward to the future. much luv.1 |
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IP:
ha ha well thanks bud... you seemed to have a pretty good grasp on what this peice was about, thanks for the feedback, peace
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IP:
I really liked that. It flowed well, and I feel like I can really relate (I'm 15). It gave me a really good image in my mind, and it grasped me from the start.
Good work. |
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IP:
Thank you I'm really glad that some one can relate to it... you know there should be a word for inbetween for females I think. Men have guy or dude but us females are thrust into woman, or caged in girl... thank ya really, peace
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IP:
i would like to meet u i dont care if u have perfect breast or not
as long as u have something there to suck on dats cool wit me even if ya got just nipples i love all breast small ,big ,i love em all uhh? where was i oh yeah nice piece |
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Registered User
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IP:
Nice work im glad some1 can actually put dwn wat a gurrl sometimes feels inside.Im also 16.But tell ur homegurrl good luk wit her baby. keep uppin~1~
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IP:
Again... haha you obviously haven't seen my pics, you'll laugh your ass off at the "something there to suck on" comment when you do. As for the rest... yea well...
BAD: I'll tell her... I'ma be there for her, even if the daddy isn't, I'm cuttin the chord in the room an all...but again it really does make me feel good to know that I'm able to write out what at least one other person feels. thanks gurl, peace |
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