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^^^Pause play, stop rewind play, pause play pause play all day^^^


Ummmm yeah a bleeding cloud, this is supposted to be rap orientated, not fuckin hello kitty,
Whatever checkin in

^if you cant write about this,
then you cant write.. period.
pick up a backpack kid.

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I easily wrote to this topic. Good luck to my opponent, this is my check-in, and my verse...


(Intro) Preconceptions of the place they call heaven
Through stories, yet truth isn't implemented
Notions of serenity, but the truth to you I'll concede
Because no matter what you've been told, Even clouds bleed. (End Intro)

Jeremy believed in life after death
But to learn of death after life, left him short of breath
For heaven wasn't at all what he'd expected
Reading the bible he thought his afterlife would be protected
But like Earth itself, Heaven's a land fueled by hatred
Jeremy learned right then and there, that nothing in the land was sacred
The streets WERE paved in gold, yet everyone was covered in tarnish
Poverty stricken parents, carrying their kids in their harness
And right then and there, he learned what 2Pac already knew
Heaven had a ghetto, and he was standing in it too.
Where gangs fought, and drugs were dealt, it defied all conventions
He thought to himself, "What the fuck's going on, this is supposed to be heaven"
And the streets where they fought were soaked in blood indeed
And when the blood poars through the streets, then the clouds start to bleed
And the blood is absorbedin these clouds, and to rain it gives birth
The tears of dead brethren lost in heaven, splash down upon the earth


















R.I.P. 2Pac

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Alright look.... Bleeding Clouds//


I look, to my calender to count the days and years,
I'm shook hearin others callin her beyond my worst fears,
Belch and remember I jus downed about twelve beers,
And realizing I just drank my only friend I feel kinda quer,
Its easy to be emotionless unless we see that clouds have tears,
Inadimate objects pain causes rain to wash away our mistakes,
And when its cold and full of hate it seems to drop snowflakes,
This isnt a rap about a cloud its the truth about personal divinity,
Positive or negative energy and all clouds can cry untill infinity,
Like I rember back in ninety three, and my uncle passed from HIV,
The only man to raise or praise me from a baby, gone instantly,
Personally causing the family clouds to scream that it cant be,
When your lied to about the disease, and learn when sixteen,
I deemed these events making a cumulious seem really mean,
And if you need a clue to this the cloud is a picture of me,

I've seen every cloud cry and realize its just how rain happens,
Lacerating a funnel cloud can Send even the hardest packin,
But when a cloud is bleeding inside, he turnes it into fuel for Rappin/

T-

Whatever the fuck, is an omen to my uncle, I wrote 4 different bars as in a poem for him.....
And I know I cant win cause mad man used Tu-Pac....
Let the voting agianst me begin

ok lemme break this shiznit down...[thats right i said shiznit ]...

mad man:

you verse shined in places, and just frankly, didnt in others...

examples of shining:

And the streets where they fought were soaked in blood indeed
And when the blood poars through the streets, then the clouds start to bleed
And the blood is absorbedin these clouds, and to rain it gives birth
The tears of dead brethren lost in heaven, splash down upon the earth

last 2 were dope

example of not shining:

Jeremy believed in life after death
But to learn of death after life, left him short of breath
For heaven wasn't at all what he'd expected
Reading the bible he thought his afterlife would be protected

idk just didnt flow with me

overall u had a good verse, not bad, not great, a good one...6.4/10


t square

your verse was good too..

example of good:

Like I rember back in ninety three, and my uncle passed from HIV,
The only man to raise or praise me from a baby, gone instantly,

example of weak:

your intro (sorry the first 4 lines were kinda weak)


Verdict: I would have voted t's way if he would ave came with a better opener...mad man had the better concept, but t executed his shit (besides the intro) a wee bit better...mm's flow was not perfect, but neither was t's....this is a close ass battle but imm say MAD MAN just cuz of t's intro...t, its not that mad mans was better then yours, you had the chanc to bring the beating on a subpar verse from MM and you flopped the intro, the most important part of the verse...you defeated yourself

^^^^ Just as a token my intro was to attribute the Alcoholizm that took the "main charater"
Into the hallusination of bleeding clouds and shit. But yeah 0-1 Mad man

Here is the deal....

Mad Man:

You put together a dope verse...if was flowed very well and didn't seem to have any problems with vocabulary and structure...

T-Square:

You also put together a dope content verse...however you didn't seem to have the flow that was put together by Mad Man...Just cause he used Tupac has nothing to do with it at all...You seemed to reach for vocabulary and your flow had some trouble spots.

VOTE: Mad Man

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I Speak Out
Battles
Pink Slips 007 Pt. 2

Ok...Well. First off I want to say boo to T-Square. You are quite the poor sport you know. If you can't handle even the thought of losing you shouldn't be competing. On that note, the fact Mad Man used 2Pac wouldn't get him the win. Tupac is no one to me, just another person that died.

For some reason I felt T-Square did better on this than Mad Man. And remember that is just a matter of opinion.
I liked Mad Man's verse as well.
So this was very close. But my vote goes to T. Even though I didn't really want to award him with a vote.

Umm...

I'll have to go with Mad Man on this...

Good stuff from both.. good imaegery and concept...

I too was swayed to mad man because of T's intro...

Vote Mad Man... in a very close one

SImple Breakdown..

Opener - Mad Man
On Topic - Both
Metas - T-Square
Wordplay - Niether
Flow - Mad Man
Enjoyment - Mad Man
Depth - Mad Man
Creativity - Niether
Finisher - Mad Man

Overall - Mad Man
Tupac Topic Was A Lil Played.. But YOu Made It Work

Return It
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...?threadid=80100

T-square.....good imagery.....i began feelin where u was goin
wit it halfway down....in the beginning i was like......eh.....its kinda
weak....but u saved the verse......good job

Madman....good wordplay and vocab....i felt as though u stayed
on topic consistantly....but......the story about heaven...me being
a religious man and all.....pissed me off u talked about heaven
that way......but....u did come better and grasped the topic better


vote: Madman

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Blessed wit Skillz

Yeah, madman did better in this piece, one of the best ive seen him write actually, T-Square's was kinda average in my opinion, you came ok, but mad man just came frsher on the topic.

Votemadman

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W o r d P e r f e c t

weiner- Mad Man

Good Luck next week.

[closed]

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Life isn't a bitch...
she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis