Aiyo sometimes I rhyme right/
and sometimes I rhyme tight/
but sometimes I feel that my rhymes won't put up a fight/
in the lime light/
star light star bright/
grant me the wish that I wish tonight/
and I want you to know/
don't be hatin' my flow/
and a vodo doll is what you're gonna sew/
but I reap what I soe/
and your body won't grow/
so I'm permantly stuck in battlin mode/
love was the code/
but now it's invalid/
and you ain't gonna hear me singin' me a ballad/
you dropped me like a bad habit/
dang nabbit/
but now I bounce back and that's why I'm Rabbit/
and oh you all alone/
without my flow/
and all you know/
is you a hoe/
and you hatin'/
and debatin/
your rhymes are whack and your flow is breakin/
but it's all right/
hey and it's okay/ im new to this game so get out of my way/
G Rabbit's here and he's gonna stay/
freestylin and flyin like he's got no today/
I heard he's a psycho/
not likin' in the light yo/
he's tryin' to make a name for himself in the hype though/
he got no crew and got no respect so/
he's gonna try and start shit with a fight yo/
someone please stop him from unleashing his might... NO!
he's here and here we go/
open mic post here trying to be free/
rappin it up like a maniac see/
Rap Battles this who I be/
G Rabbit's my name what you think of me?/
am I aight and pretty good for a honkey/
or am I a whack ass no skilled monkey?/
you tell me and let me know/
cuz I wanna be great but I gotta grow/
Aiyo one...

What you think?

aight....................thought it was kinda basic an you aint writin in full lines,

keep practicing and "IT SHALL COME"

see ya dawg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

check my latest work

it was a alright peice, you should try to make all your lines the same length though it kinda flows better that way, it was pretty basic too but keep dropping and keep elevating.