anotha bored drop... feedback is wanted...

Made to Shot Down beat

Aiyyo, a nigga wit a trigga aint nothin
Unless he cock & pull and he hits sumthin.../ (shit...)
I represent my hometown when I need to
Im always down for battles when da time's due/
I'll toss sum blades... for a kill quicky
Then turn demonic... like Little Nicky.../ (Uh oh...)
Shit's quikly... turnin... inside out... (OUT!)
Follow along and let tha bullet eat ur guts OUT!/
Typical lyrical spitta tha hitta Hoo..RAH! (No...)
I'll make ya holla like Ja... (Now Let's Go...)/
Sick and tired of wankstaz and actors...
U'll get... blasted wit ur weak factors..../ (Damn...)
Tryina blaze 2nite? Where da weed at?
Tryina eat 2nite? Where's da feed at?/ (Uh Huh...)
Ima leave ya to bleed where U GOT SHOT! (WHAT?!)
Then leave ya when tha block's HOT! (WHAT?!)/
Tha glock's hot... shit... let it cool down...
U wanna challenge me? So, how's it goin down/
Are u crazy... tryina step to me?!
Left from G... then u went C-R-I-P?/
Fuck tha gang shit... I dont rep none of dem... (Wha...)
Cause u'll give ur life to be tha son of dem... Haha/
If u want beef, then come holla at me (BITCH!)
Dont turn pussy and point a gat at me/ (BITCH!)
Try dat shit... (What?) And my boyz comin (Its Over)
IF u try runnin.. (What?) Then my boyz gunnin/
If u got sumthin to say then go out ur way
Cause no nigga put me down anyway.../ (anyway...)
Ur crew does shit thats... simplistic
That'll lead to me doin... sum..thin ballistic/
Dont fuck wit me nigga, U'll get put in tha ground
Dont claim what ur not cause U'll get SHOT DOWN!/ (Nigga!...)

A lil sumthin i wrote last night while listenin to tha song... uppin...

Nice little drop...

Good metas...

Saw some traces of DMX type lingo and phrases.
Cool, cool.

Nice effects with the background hollas...

Nice read.

Good flow, good beat.

I'd say about a 7/10...

Would given more, but the content wasn't very original. (kill, kill, kill)

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For my convenience, not yours!

like da way you phrased it, but i thought the flow was lost abit in places

"Fuck tha gang shit... I dont rep none of dem... (Wha...)
Cause u'll give ur life to be tha son of dem... Haha/
If u want beef, then come holla at me (BITCH!)
Dont turn pussy and point a gat at me/ (BITCH!)"

thought these was ya weakest lines.... but on the whole it was an alright drop...aight dawg

I agree wit Born To Kill all da way!!!!!!!!
peep... vverd-pley when eva you getta chance.
hollla

yea the overall feel was there...
but B2K over there is right u need some topical insight if all the lines are gonna be about guns...

da flow was off at points.period. However i dig the points where it was on....

i don't think you should bother tweakin this... just start over with a blank page and don't get caught trying to be "gangsta-cute"

{Peace}

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thanx for tha feedback ppl. Uppin for more.

Yeah this was a good piece, it was a pretty good read as well, it flowed pretty well through out the piece i thought, you had good vocab, and your content was good too, overall id say it was a good piece, keep dropping..

and if you could return the feedback..
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=83050

nice feedback Masta C. Uppin.

This was a good piece I thought. The flow was nice but the vocab was a little off I think. But good drop. Keep Elevatin!