This is something that I wrote recently and it means a lot to me. So please, dont sleep on it. There is a hidden message and hopefully you will all find it. Please dont sleep on this and please post your thoughts..thanks



What I thought was another day
Became something totally different
I heard the news and I began to cry
Was it true?
Yet it is in my hands in black and white

I should have known
I should have listened
How could someone hurt me like this?
Why?
What did I do to them?

It happened a little while ago
I’m the fourth soul that knows about it
The first two are the ones who committed it
A crime of hate
A crime that should have been avoided and wasn’t
I thought things were different,
Yet they are still the same
I thought my friend had changed
But he is exactly the same way he was before

Is it possible that some way this is my fault?
If I would have done something different
If I would have handled things a different way
I should have listened to everyone else
They all told me, yet I ignored them
A missing link is now found and unveiled and I cant bear it

I read it and began to cry
In an instant, I couldn’t hold myself up any longer
All of my strength left me as I brake down
I didn’t know what to do
Or what to think
I confided in my best friend, and he’s keeping me safe
He’s the only one that I can trust at this point
Besides a few from school, but I don’t want them to know.

I can no longer hold onto my relationship that I have
I cant bear it anymore and I’m sorry
I love you, but I cant bear it.
This isnt the way I wanted everything to turn out
We were going to get married, and have a family
But I cant
I wish I could but I cant

Now I will leave.
Go where no one can find me or even touch me
If they try, they wont like the consequences
I tried, but hope no longer exists
Thanks to what happened, I shall leave....









And never come back…



No one can bring me back now.....

Hmmm... what can I say?

You've got a lot of hurt emotions that you displayed. I'm not entirely sure how to comment on that tactfully, save to say that hopefully when you feel hurt that'll eventually get better.

I can't say I found the hidden message either. I may have, and I just don't want to comment on it because I probably got it wrong and I'll look stupid, but I can assure you that I didn't get the message. Something tells me it revolves around the crime and not the actualy death though.

Peace be unto you, it's all I can think to say.

~Shalom~

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Quote:

Originally posted by Bruklor Nec is just dumb

I'm taking that as a compliment.

I'm confused.. I dont really understand what this poem is about, other than the hurt that you feel about something. I have a slight idea about what it is about, but I garuntee I'm wrong.. because I have a few different ideas running through my head. I mean, the anger, and the emotion was obviously displayed to me.. but the message behind it wasnt obvious. I can't pick it up. This was a good poem, it would've been better if the message was displayed clearly, but obviously by the poem you didnt want it to be. SO i think this poem is great.

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Sorry for confusing u two. The actual hidden meaning is that I just found out the night that I wrote this, that my b/f cheated on me for the second time. I confrunted him about it, but he denys it. I dont really know what to think. There were a lot of thoughts goin thro my head when I wrote this, so it prob will confuse a lot of ppl. Sorry bout that. Thanks for the feedback tho

Well now that I know what you're talking about it makes complete sense.. the feelings are real.. they're good.. wow.. really good poem. Nice job!

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Thanks for the feedback gurl. Yo shit is nice too. Keep up the good work. Thanks again.

man i woulda neva figured out that wuz tha message.Now I understand these lines:

-It happened a little while ago
I’m the fourth soul that knows about it
The first two are the ones who committed it
A crime of hate
A crime that should have been avoided and wasn’t-

all in all a hot piece.I liked how u got ur feelings of frustation out alot differently from when most ppl would be like "U played me for the last time" " I wuz w/ur friend last night anyway blah blah blah".I can tell u had a lotta time invested in tha relationship,I wish u tha best.Keep writin, Stay ^
-Avi

Very deep message, i was thinking of your b/fs death was what you writing about. maybe you might as well have been, seems like he's pretty much dead to you right now, maybe thats where all this energy and this raw emotion came from. It really was a great piece, liked the challenge of finding the hidden truth behind it. great drop.

Great poem girl. I picked up on the hidden message about half way though. A relationship that u had turned sour due to something happening. This piece is full of emotion and deep as a oil rigs run piping. Your piece is heartfelt and a great read. Keep dropin Angel. Look forward to reading more from you.

MM

Thanks all for the feedback, keep it comin. Right now I honestly dont know what to do with him. Part of me wants to kill him, but the other says that maybe its a lie and that i should believe him. I dont know what to do. Its really weird, because pretty much all the time i do....anywayz...thanks for the feedback....keep it comin. I guess i hid the message pretty good, only one person got it right away it seems like. but thanks.

Tren...oops, i mean Mopar Madness <chuckle> u knew wat it was bout as soon as u read tha title...don't try to deny it...I did too...

as for tha piece, not a fan of this work... i like things that have more heart to them and i wasn't really feelling any heart, just anger and all anger will do is consume tha heart, then ur screwed...

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Ya, thanks dude. <hehe>, yea, its iight that you guys knew it. cause ur all smart like dat. u kno u r angellic. Yea, I know how that is, but in this I was venting. You know how that is. Thanks for the feedback. Most respect.

Hmmm iTs tOo LoNg... i aiNT Gon ReaD DaT!!!...

NaWw... BuTTuH...oH iM JuSs pLayEn... i DeCiDeD tO ReaD iT Ne Way...

i DuNNo iT LoOKs LiKe??...uUuHH... u GoT uH PaPeR? DaT SeD SuMoNe iS DeaD? i DuNNo...

But GyeaH wHaTeVeR iT iS... i HoPe u CaN Get BeTTuR.. N KeeP ya HeaD uP....

(No LauGHiN MaTTeR...MaH BaD)

Thanks for the feedback, keep it comin.