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Guest
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Awesome FReestyle Check this gimme sum criticism
IP:
im tryin to rite betta so i started countin sylabbles so id have betta flow
gimme some criticism | belabor is to attack with blows and NWA is a 1988 rap group that is a classic and they had a song called fuck tha police -------------------------------------------------------------- i spit shit that you cant even comprehend // 10 you spit back but this battles without-a-end // 11 ya fucked up youll be the next victim on ER // 11 youll come out looking like some used cigar // 10 "doctor there ain't sposed to be no amputation" // 11 pray quick here comes your termination // 10 i lyrically stabbed u in the heart // 10 your arteries jarred ur gushin blood on my jeans // 12 ambulance gets there ur called dead at the scene // 11 i get arrested cuz my lyrics are so raw // 11 tried to handcuff me so i broke his jaw // 10 ran from the crime scene a fugitive of the law // 12 i stole a car and ran over the neighbor // 11 watch out bitches im known to belabor // 10 ill kill any old hag that does wrong to me // 11 gimme back my mercedes it belongs to me // 12 [chorus] 2x im-a fugitive of the law //8 peopz like my shit cuz its raw // 7 so back the fuck up krines comin thru // 9 dont get outta ma-way ill kill u // 8 cuz im-a motha fuckin fugitive // 10 im headed for the border guns gallore // 10 just now ordered them all by mail order // 10 pop the ak out the side window watch out // 11 crash the car roll on the ground its a shoot out // 11 sqeeze-da-trigger till its totally depleted // 12 give-it-up pigs i cant be defeated // 10 they think why the hell not and call in the swat // 11 suddenly i burst up im another tupac // 12 i yell out like NWA "fuck tha police" // 11 keep fightin till there numbers greatly decrease // 11 fuck peace i wont stop till they start to cease // 10 they launch heat seaking missiles stop tha pistols // 11 im gone but not to heaven im goin to hell // 12 they pounded me down in there like a rusty nail // 12 [chorus] 4x im-a-MOTHA FUCKIN fugitive of the FUCKIN law |
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Veteran
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IP:
You had some good flow here...
The syllable counting did you aight. But your content was pretty weak and herbish. Thug? Bangin? Whatever... Ya think we ain't heard this before? So-so rhyme scheme, ok imagery, some good vocab... All around, 5.75/10
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Merkings will occur Monday thru Friday, 8 am thru 5 pm, C.S.T. For my convenience, not yours! |
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Banned: Spamming
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IP:
Wack.
- 5766 / 10 Pz.
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W o r d P e r f e c t ![]() ^This is your IP bitch! |
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Word.
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IP:
You need to leave 3 links or 3 names of people you left feedback to or this will get closed, Thanks.
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