As I watch myself in the mirror
my mind sees a complex river//
I am matter and matter exists
but matter is also shit//
So what does it matter
if I just get madder//
Am I shit or is shit me
I have shit, is shit reality?//
Or is reality the decency to believe?
I confuse my senses and find myself relieved//
how can I be sure that I exist when im just atoms
I cant see my struture no matter how hard I stare at 'em//
these questions that boggle minds
maybe I can find the answers later in time//
I see its hard, too hard to see
Am I living just couse I breathe?//
or does life breathe from me
and create reality?//
Life is shit, should I embrace it
or is a shitty life a replacement?//
truth is knowledge
So do they speak with no lies in college?//
happiness can be inscribed in a kiss
does that make love defined in true bliss....//

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uppin man wats up with this forum, its so dead lately....

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I'm only not replying to everyone's peices because I'm a shameful lazy bastard. I dunno what everyone's elses excuses are.

This was an interesting peice. Not sure how else to put. It seemed to ramble on from one thing to another, but it did so with some creativity. I liked how it played on certain words and things.

I am matter and matter exists
but matter is also shit//
So what does it matter
if I just get madder//
Am I shit or is shit me
I have shit, is shit reality?//

That was my favorite part.

Overall these was well... interesting. It doesn't look like it would flow, but it does. The rhymes aren't too complex, but aint simple either. And it really does cause the mind to think of things reading it. So it was pretty damn good.

~Shalom~

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Quote:

Originally posted by Bruklor Nec is just dumb

I'm taking that as a compliment.

thank you necro for sum truly good review statments. this poem was made quick (like almost all of my other ones) the idea in this poem, was simply put, wonder. i wonder alot of things, how were we made, wat is love, why do we exist, do we exist, what is truth. so i decided to make a poem about it, i wasnt sure if i should have made it longer or keep it short and sweet. so with sum strict time(and my ass being lazy) i just decided to keep it short. the flow was made like that on purpose, kinda to go with the wonder. a strange flow, for a strange poem. i was hoping i would get more replies, but i guess ppl are just lazy this weekend. well watever, uppin.

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ok this one was a lil bit confusing but i kinda sorta get it after i read how you explained it.
FAV PART!!
As I watch myself in the mirror
my mind sees a complex river//

thanx B, its real tite that u like my poems, im real glad i have a fan ya, it was meant to be a lil bit confusing but also to make ppl think. the rhyme scheme was made to contort to the thoughts. thanx again

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