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Old 01-11-04, 05:59 PM   #1
Yaz
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Corrupted Visions:[Keep It Krakin]<fir5t drop by Yaz>

IP: B42F F1DA

Tyme passes... but nuthin laz forever
seemz my life isen't gettin ne better
the streetz eat at ma soul, juz ta let me know
nuthinz gettin better kuz, juz let it go
eat. strike, ride, fight, take a life
steal, sleep, kill, to end the strife
ain't gonna get better know matter how it happenz
my life feelz like itz gone... but ima keep it krakin

[¢our5e]
keep it krakin ni¢¢a, never let up kuz
betta strap in ni¢¢a, or u gonna be lost
trapt in deathz klut¢hz, resisten¢e iz pain
puttin your self through strain
dun make me kall out yo name

[Ver5e 2]
spoken wordz kan ¢hange many diffrent veiwz
so sumone frontin wit me, iz alwayz a fuk you
anoutha enamy on ma blok, looken fo a glok
ta kok, shop pok an step on me like a sok
ready or not ni¢¢a, yo tymez up
your linez suk, so waz fuked, u ¢hump
thinken u gonna jump me, ni¢¢a I stand strong
send yo whole krew kuz they aint gonna last long
im a task bomb, set to to blow wene u hit
take out yo family, friendz an yo klik
ya kant bring me down ni¢¢a, i Keep It Krakin
pleaze dun front an spare me all the laghin
u gonna die ni¢¢a, so hang your karrer
Yaz iz taken top, yall juz get outta here

[¢our5e x2]
keep it krakin ni¢¢a, never let up kuz
betta strap in ni¢¢a, or u gonna be lost
trapt in deathz klut¢hz, resisten¢e iz pain
puttin your self through strain
dun make me kall out yo name

Last edited by Yaz : 01-11-04 at 06:12 PM.
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Old 01-11-04, 06:19 PM   #2
-uski-
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not bad man for ya first open mic....ya first Verse seemed a bit to short But it was alright.....ya structure has improvd a lot since me and you started off....anyway this was alright we have done a few open mics in the past.........but anyway man this was decent Read.....Keep it Dropin Man..PeacE...
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Old 01-11-04, 10:06 PM   #3
Yaz
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haha pimpen thanx fo the feed bak kuz, uppin fo feed
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Old 01-12-04, 12:15 PM   #4
Dev
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thought this was ok..... the flow could have been better... the syllables were a bit choppy... thought the barz could have been a bit longer... but the scheme seemed to work alright..... the verses could have been a bit longer... and some good solid wordplay would have helped...aside from that.. decent little drop...pZ
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Old 01-12-04, 01:48 PM   #5
Gene Pool
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I hafta agree with Dev man. it ain't the best written I've seen u do but it was alright, everything juss seemed a lil rough around the edges but keep elevatin bro. peace.
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<center><table style=filter:GLOW(color=red)>Atmosphere - inspirations of following in the footsteps of story tellin rhymes</table></center>

<center>Corrupted Visions</center>

<center><table style=filter:GLOW(color=black)>Giving Sight A Third Eye</table></center>
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Old 01-12-04, 02:56 PM   #6
FanTa ZeE
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hey, yo the kid who had a horrible habit of using 5's for S's right? LMAO..well welcome to C.V

that was your first open mic? it was good, needed a little touching up but when i compare it to my first open mic, i'm the one cringing! LMAO..you have talent there kiddo!
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Old 01-12-04, 10:39 PM   #7
Yaz
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rok on... that waz written like 4 monthz ago an i juzz put it up for feed on it, bloodtik lol, iight uppin fo 5ome more feed on thyz

(5umone tell me how many tymez er aloud ta up for feed)
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