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Old 02-03-04, 03:24 PM   #1
Edicius
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Pot'Ed Ft. RythmicTendicies - Inchanced Temptations

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Pot1ent (Grass Hopper)

Something I would never do is become a Needle Junkys
Something I could never do is produce Tweadle Funkys
But could you resist,' Pot 'Ed 'Music Like We Pied Piper
And could you exist while being Hit By Alligned Snipers
A Timed Writer sits, With the clocks flipped, Thats Me!
If You Was A Teabagging Boss ' Could You Sack Me? '
Or, Say what the Facts Be infront of Stephen Hawkins
Then make him buy wheelchairs from Greiving Auctions
Yo Raise Your Hands Every listener a Noah to Our Arch
They Praise The Plans Marry a Jew Under Hashem Arch
Get rid of the Last Seen Lark? Could you Self Destruct?
Or could you be a Pure Catholic, and Health Be Fucked
Then you try and 'Endure Erratic Piranhas' Fresh Blood
Or just finish a roast dinner and then teeth Mesh Grubs
Or go out and buy Pot 'Ed cd while Everyone Else Dubs
Could You Do This?

RythmicTendicies

Inchanced Temptations Clouded By My Morality..
My Fascinations With Evil Is Darkened By My Righteous Reality...
I'm Clean, Living A Life Of Oblivious Obscene...
But I Keep Living My Life, As If It Were A Beautiful Dream...

Edicius
Raping the innocent, low class of society
taking advantage of sex-for-rent..
Abusing ur own visions..to clarify whats bad..
Cant stand those people..
who suffer from a social collision,so i express myself w/ a message pad..
Cause i dont understand..why people act like this..
rapist's & crackheads..weak..just makes me pissed...
Couldnt picture myself as somone taking anothers ones life..
bitter conflict's, result in 'often' violent endings of this strife..
To many off us..the question stays tho the answer keeps unremained..
people's mind in abnormal state's
in which development has stopped prematurely by their own judgements sustained.
like older man w/ an attraction to little kids, i dont care if its an attempt to bid!
you need to get an exsamenation in ur head..
if not! you deserve it that soon u cant even open ur lids..
& i dont care if u had a ruff life,what happend, it just did!..dont live in the past..
Ur responsable for ur actions now! in life we are equal! no one is surpass..
people struggle on & on in there life, even tho the mirror dont show all what they see..
if u look on here above, i know people who live like that,
but seriously it could never be me..

RythmicTendicies

Inchanced Temptations Clouded By My Morality..
My Fascinations With Evil Is Darkened By My Righteous Reality...
I'm Clean, Living A Life Of Oblivious Obscene...
But I Keep Living My Life, As If It Were A Beautiful Dream...
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Last edited by Edicius : 02-03-04 at 03:31 PM.
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Old 02-03-04, 03:35 PM   #2
Cinderella
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Um long, took me a while to get through it, but it was well worth it. A fine piece of literature I would say, good ryhiming and use of words and such... write more.
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Old 02-03-04, 03:36 PM   #3
Edicius
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=) Sure thing .. thanks girl =) upper..
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Old 02-03-04, 03:41 PM   #4
Daz
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Get rid of the Last Seen Lark? Could you Self Destruct?
Or could you be a Pure Catholic, and Health Be Fucked
Then you try and 'Endure Erratic Piranhas' Fresh Blood
Or just finish a roast dinner and then teeth Mesh Grubs
^^ i liked that shit...good imagery on that and nice multies..

Abusing ur own visions..to clarify whats bad..
Cant stand those people..
who suffer from a social collision,so i express myself w/ a message
..........................
i dont care if u had a ruff life,what happend, it just did!..dont live in the past..
Ur responsable for ur actions now! in life we are equal! no one is surpass.
^^also nice...very i liked it..nice conceptz....

the whole chorus was dope..very creative very nice flow...what more can i say? doperz
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Old 02-03-04, 03:54 PM   #5
Penskills
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Hmmm..nice..even the young grasshopper's verse was nice...and Rt came with a strong hook and Ed came with a strong finish..I like your opening Ed..this was a nice collab...peace...homos~~~~~~~`
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Old 02-03-04, 03:57 PM   #6
Dev
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well i just posted up a breakdown... the damn thing fucked up.....so aint gonna do one again.... i thought this was a good drop.... sounds familiar... but it was... the main thing i wasnt keen on was the opening of the first 2 lines, seemed like a bit of a filler... thats my opinion.... but ya had a good scheme,,, also i thought the first bar's rhyming sounded a bit too similar... but you stayed pretty consistant thru...... thought the flow was pretty smooth too, with a good amount of syllables...... sorry its short, but im sick of repeating what i wrote like 5 mins ago, before it fucked up......keep em rolling
........didnt realise that it was a collab.... the something, something... took my eyes away from potent... sorry

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Old 02-03-04, 05:01 PM   #7
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Enjoyable peice...
Good read, some good flow
Mainstream flow which is good..
Good vocab, some usage of wordplay
Looks like it'd be a good audio collab too..
It'd be dope to here also...... Props to it tho..
Very dope piece, keep tha shit up.. nice work...
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Old 02-03-04, 06:20 PM   #8
Accelerate
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Potent.. Very nice verse, good take on your point of view and a good take on the vocabulary, flow, and overall dopeness. Good use of multies, making it easy to read, but not overdoing it either. Very Nice Put together verse, Which you packed well with imagery and an overall great use of your words, and some good as hell metaphors..
R.T, you put up a nice hook, nothing I can say bad about, very good hook.
Edicius.. Very Nice opening lines..Fucking dope, And though your structure was long as hell, You put up some dope metaphors, and Very Nice way to express your message.
The Writer's voice was definately evident in both verses, and You guys always compliment each others styles, which is dope.
Dope Piece..
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Old 02-03-04, 06:32 PM   #9
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very nice verses from the 2, nice vocab and wordplay, liked the topic. corus was very well written, vocab was amazing in it. whole thing flowed very well, very decent collab...hit my peice up if you can
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=111741
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Old 02-04-04, 07:01 AM   #10
Edicius
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Will do soon..thanks all..Upper..

Oh and structure is not long, the flow reduce's it.. songwrittin.. =)
^Up.
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Old 02-04-04, 11:09 AM   #11
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potient had some nice bits of imagery and flowed well
very abstract in alot of places and im sure ur the only one who knew what ur talking about
i enjoyed it though
the hook...
not bad the first bar was a bit long but the second half was a nice touch

eddy (< he loves being called that)
i found it really difficult to catch the rhyming in this..
seemed non existent in parts
(maybe its just me..i dunno
content was sound though..feeling that at least
not a bad collab..
but didnt really grip me
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Old 02-04-04, 11:21 AM   #12
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Thanks everyone, and fgee I appreciate the critism, I agree with it totally, i think Pot 'Ed could do ALOT better. That sort of feedback just helps us acheive it easier, also we haven't wrote in ages, but its all gravy.
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Old 02-04-04, 03:27 PM   #13
Edicius
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Fuck that im dope..

thanx all Upper..
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