from out of my heart i dug a part of a dark slug
mortally wounded shot and ignited heat like a spark plug
pain from inside my mind spreading worse than cancer
raising my arms to the sky begging god for an answer
left alone quiet just like i started
had your eulogy written " dearly departed.."
severly discarded my existence has no point no meaning except one
grab the micraphone and leave these dunns with nothing but crumbs

This was alright.....the structure was ok in this.....it was kinda short...should try making it a little longer than that, i felt you could go on with this a lot longer than what you did....the flow was alright, flowed well....had some ok multies....but overall this was alright...keep at it.