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02-13-04, 12:27 PM | #1 | |||||||
The Golden Chyld
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Seconds Away
IP: 17B3 6207
Thou shalt have no other gods before me
Exodus 20:3 A story about a church goin' man with 24 hours left of his life .. 12:00 PM Lost in a dream of happiness .. this life who's reality is sorrow. Evolving around money and flashiness .. always hopin for a richer tomorrow. Heart, hollow. No love for peasants .. or the homeless askin for change. Hard headed, not one for lessons .. short tempered, head burnin in flames. He claims he's kidhearted and giving .. not greedy and/or self praising. Never had to make a living .. his family's riches raised him lazy. 10:00 AM Alarmed by the clock on the dresser .. he takes his time to wake up. Claims hi image is hi greatest treasure .. gettin dressed while thinkin of a story to make up. He's late, so what! He's rich and famous .. he's allowed all the time in the world. Surrounded by beautiful girls, who's aim is .. th have him buy them diamonds and pearls. Daydreamin abou his perfect life .. and the lesser lives of so many others. Money could buy him the perfect wife .. and easily bribe her to become a mother. No need to love her, it's only for .. the look of a happy family and all. His daydream would've led to snores .. but luckily his office received a call. 5:00 PM On his way home, he drives slowly .. thinkin of ways to spend his money. But even the richest get lonely .. sometimes shit like that can be funny. Quietly he prays, and asks politely .. to be sent a woman he can cherish. A woman he can sleep with nightly .. without becoming too embarassed. So he inherits his angel of love .. and eventually 4gets who answer his prayer. Goes back to the man he once was .. cherishin his money more than air. But he doesn't care, life's runnin smoothly .. he has a woman to cry in his arms. She's there 2 give him hugs of soothing .. he starts thinkin nothin can go wrong. 11:55 PM Half asleep next to his wife .. joyful, happy, everythings goin well. Proud, because this is his life .. and he'll soon have children to tell. About his riches, jewelry and possessions .. and the money he has to spend. Suddenly darkness surrounds with aggression .. and the air begins to grow thin. Then an angel approaches in light .. and walks slowly toward this man. He tries to wake up, this isn't right .. he's shakin and showin sweaty hands. He stnads up, weak in the knees .. as the angel begins to ask. What the man would rather have .. holdin in his hand a bible, the other, cash. The man laughs, his face shows a smile .. he grabs for the money he dearly treasures. With the stupidity of a child .. the angel tells him his pick isn't clever. But never would the man let go .. of the valuable riches he idolized. The angel tried to correct, but no .. the man stared his money down with righteous eyes. Soon after he died, his whole life, a sin-free blessin .. but he didn't seem to learn his lesson today. His whole life he preayed he'd go to heaven .. and in the end, he was only seconds away. |
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02-13-04, 12:42 PM | #2 | ||||||
Guest
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IP: 24A3 0EF0
pretty ill drop
decent rhyme scheme got a little choppy at times suited the piece well though.. seemed like a kinda mellowed out piece in a way..which in turn suited the mellowed out rich mans actions really liked the ending..very good twist interesting read overall.. 'The man laughs, his face shows a smile .. he grabs for the money he dearly treasures. With the stupidity of a child .. the angel tells him his pick isn't clever. ^yep..nice props |
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02-13-04, 02:11 PM | #3 | |||||||
The Golden Chyld
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IP: 17B3 6207
uppin .. thanks for the read fgee .. one
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02-14-04, 12:37 PM | #4 | |||||||
The Golden Chyld
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IP: 17B3 6207
upping !
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