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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
05-16-04, 04:31 PM
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#1
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Its Da Real Deal
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Am I Invisible
IP: 7BE2 A0A1
Am i invisible
to you? cant you see me standin here I thought i was your friend but i guess im not anymore You dont call anymore Im waiting here invisible waiting as your distance friend thinking of you Here, waiting just me Me, the one you dont talk to anymore but i know you see me here am I really that invisible to you? My long lost friend We were friends werent we? me and you together at once but not anymore but real friends arent invisible so why am i standing here? Here, as an old friend that seems invisible my other friends see me so why dont you anymore so what's going on with you? So as i watch you over there and im over here we wont talk anymore because im with my new friends who i know see me therefore im not invisible
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 <marquee>  </marquee> No ones gonna stop me |
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05-16-04, 06:08 PM
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#2
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yawn
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IP: 06D4 9403
Ehh... It was alright. I didnt like the structure. The it had some emotion in it, but no real imagery. It was real simple, but was to the point. Not my kind of poetry but it was an alright drop. Keep your head up and drop some more.
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do your research.  |
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05-16-04, 08:18 PM
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#3
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Its Da Real Deal
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IP: 3240 794D
thx
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<marquee> </marquee> No ones gonna stop me |
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05-16-04, 08:58 PM
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#4
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RV SPOTLIGHT, GET AT ME!
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IP: AA51 3382
yes you are invisible.
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  I had to get a new couch, but as you can see the fun continues! A.I.
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05-16-04, 09:51 PM
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#5
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Its Da Real Deal
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IP: C1DA C961
hahaha not even funny
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<marquee> </marquee> No ones gonna stop me |
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05-17-04, 01:45 PM
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#6
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New to RB
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IP: E57C 347F
pretty much what the other guy said, i think you have to work on your creativity.. like it was not horrible, try and make it make more sense next time.. but i was feeling it tho, i know where you coming from... overall it was alright, nothing too bad and nothing too good, so if i was to put it on a scale of 10, i'd thro up a 6/10... stay up, keep at it,..
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