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Old 10-27-04, 10:46 AM   #1
Ice Pick
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Thumbs up 1980, realest shit i ever wrote

IP: 7D0B D7B5

I dunno not really a poem or open mic

sort of both


holla with some feed





1980,the year my life was blessed from Heaven
pops got to steppin,pops in my head was laid to rest then
its a hard lesson,it started a heart of second guessin
for the rest of life stressin,not to mention the tension that came to set in
from Moms,blow jobs for johns with no clothes on
always gone,dope in palm singin the song of right gone wrong
not understandin,had hate for God cause I know He planned it
straight left me stranded,empty handed man damn I'm branded
with fatal sicknesses,from cradle been known to do the sickest shit
a relentless kid,murderous intensions while bent-invent the sickest spit
nothin can help,thats why I stay confined inside myself
done cried whats left,died and came back two times like tribe called quest
its forever flowin,and constantly growin-where-ever I'm goin
I've been severin and sewin,deliverin bows-endeavourin lows and
comin off often hypocritical,they had the coffin locked but I slid it forth
past a kid at four,I've already walked ya'lls talk come see what I did it for


when I look to the sky,I wonder why my tears dont cry
are they lost in lies,lost in despise of the wisemens lines from behind
my eyes,minds twisted up a vision of so a called Heaven thats shady
so I go to infinit,from my incision in that was givin in 1980
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Last edited by Ice Pick : 10-27-04 at 11:21 AM.
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Old 10-27-04, 11:17 AM   #2
fluidmoon
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wow,these are some intense lyrics right here, you got open on this poem and i can relate to this emotional piece immensely, great job on this man....."I've already walked y'alls talk,come see what i did it for.."...haha nice line....1
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Old 10-27-04, 02:50 PM   #3
Grammar Popo
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Very good. Sensational flow and very good rhyming. Very good vocab as well. Emotion also good. Overall very good. Keep up the phenomenal work.
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rap4 ( P ) Pronunciation Key (rp)
n. Slang: A form of popular <a href="http://www.ntsearch.com/search.php?q=music&v=56">music</a> developed especially in African-American urban communities and characterized by spoken or chanted rhyming lyrics with a syncopated, repetitive rhythmic accompaniment.

^Don't forget the white man^
Poetic Scriptures poems:
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=157364
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=157462
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