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Old 02-08-05, 07:20 PM   #1
Trifecta
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Question Just Starting

IP: BE9C A0B9

I kno u dont think about me as much as i think about u/
Thinking of the good tymes we could have but u have no Clu/
Me and u could be something big the next Dynamic Duo/
Just me and you through out the world our realationship as soft as a pillow/
Everytyme i c u i stumBle and Cant eVen talk/
my lips get sealed shut like a titanium lock/-Trifecta
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Old 02-08-05, 07:34 PM   #2
Trifecta
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IP: BE9C A0B9

More to come for this shit - aint dont yet
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Old 02-08-05, 11:35 PM   #3
Mentor
a.k.a prozak
 
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yo..i could tell u a beginner no beef but u need ta elevate, i'll give ya some quick tips while i'm at it cuz i'm not just gonna laugh in ur face and never bother to read ur shit again i gotta give u some hope. k, u need to know bout how ta add multi's in ur shit the more syllabales u add in ur lyrics the more it grabs the readers attention and if u watch how the rest of atleast decent rappers do it, they mostly spit shit that people could relate or feel ta what ur saying it also helps if u read there shit too and leave ur honest opinion in the feed u send to 'em...remember the more respect u give on this site the more respect u get
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Old 02-09-05, 06:41 AM   #4
Trifecta
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IP: BE9C A0B9

iight thanks for being honest and this post

Last edited by Trifecta : 02-09-05 at 06:42 AM. Reason: it didnt make sense
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Old 02-09-05, 06:43 AM   #5
mizz fyre
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i'll start with your flow, could be improved if you try and get your lines the same length,you rhyme technique was very basic work on coming more complex with your vocab, words such as you, clue....doesn't cut it very well. work on expandin your concept, come complex as i said before. keep elevatin
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