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Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio ![]() |
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My First Try
IP: 09B1 3966
(THE-EGG-MAN)
THIS IS MY FIRST TIME HERE IN THE WORLD OF RAP DISS MY SHIT TURN AROUND, GET CLAPPED IM SITTING HERE LISTERNING TO SHIT IF IT DONT GET BETTER SOON I'LL BURST INTO A FIT I WISH THESE BITCHES WOULD JUST LEARN TO QUIT I'LL PUT THEM OUT WITH A HIT LIKE A CANDLE THATS LIT (NINE MILLIMETER) THAT WAS THE EGG MAN'S FIRST SHOT, DONT KNOCK IT, OR HAVE YA FORGOT WE ALL START SOMEWHERE, NOT ALL YOU'LL ARE HOT YOUR SOME FUCKED UP BITCHES, LIKE YA HIGH ON POT DONT GET TO ATTACHED, LIKE A BLOOD CLOTT GET TO CLOSE, PROMISS YOU'LL GET SHOT I'LL LEAVE A HORSE HEAD, LIE'IN IN YOUR KIDS COTT (THE-EGG-MAN) THATS SOME REAL SICK SHIT MAN LIKE THE BOMBS THEY DROPPED ON SAD-AM THE FUCK DIDNT TRY IN THE WAR HE MAKED IT ALL SEEM A REAL BORE THE FAGGOT WASNT MAD, JUST BAD TO THE CORE LIKE A RAPIST WITH A KNIFE UP ON A WHORE |
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IP: A476 6362
Not to bad, ya need to up ya vocab some more but overall it was a good thing.
Peep My newest drop, Dear God. |
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BANNED For Being A Dipshit
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IP: 43E3 43B4
ya get 14 IQ points.
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IP: 6592 2BD0
not bad as R.x said, improve your vocab, (don't put it all in caps!), you has a o.k line here: "I'LL PUT THEM OUT WITH A HIT LIKE A CANDLE THATS LIT" - good use of intersyllable rhyming, even if it was basic...
keep it up dawg! |
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BANNED For Being An Idiot
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IP: C22E FA17
not bad for first time, rhyme scheme was simple, vocab and rhymes need to be upped although u ahd some nice rhymes in there for a newbie, howeva some rhymes were not good and very dodgy, wordplay was included which is uprising for a newbie but it needs to be a lot betta
Eborted Verdict- D- ^^^^ an extremely good grade for a first timer keep writing kid |
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Guest
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IP: F3B7 67E1
nahh that wasnt bad
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