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Old 09-17-03, 12:43 AM   #1
Phrantik
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IC: 13th Diciple .vs. Quotient

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Rules.

Pre-Season Week 1
Topic: First Words
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Last edited by Phrantik : 09-17-03 at 12:50 AM.
 
Old 09-17-03, 01:05 AM   #2
Precise.
Therapist or The Rapist ?
 
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I'm here. Lets go 20-25 lines.
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R.I.P.- Epimetheus
Robert L. Rem
1986-2003
 
Old 09-17-03, 02:12 PM   #3
13th Disciple
i eat..eat..eat..emcees
 
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thats cool...........lets do it.............
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Old 09-19-03, 02:48 PM   #4
13th Disciple
i eat..eat..eat..emcees
 
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....wheres there ever a point in ur life...when u just needed
someone to confide in......someone to talk to....and then.....the
person u least expected to speak to ur heart.....did?......




feel the realness


a clear black night,clear blue moon, 4 walls closin in my seed
asleep in the room...
how soon?...2 subsiding of pain,a shine on my rain, a season 4
my flower to bloom...
memories of a once happily groom...in the past, but torment
decided to last....
demons decided to laugh...a constant harass, even exiled me and
gave up on Mass...
alas, anxiety attacks led 2 depression & temptations of crack...
replayin back 2 the facts.....acts...that led to a series of slaps...
gotta relax...let go & let God...go on & not focus on the maybe's...
i'd be wrong 2 move on....its a must 2 be strong 4 at least the
sake of the baby....
rid of the leading lady..but theres a member still part of the script..
o wretched man that i am!....was at the point of not givin a shit...
struggles of wantin 2 quit...wantin 2 run, only the bond kept me
between me & my son...
a mental dungeon...trapped, like Amistads blacks, gazin on the
nozzle of a .44 gun...
just turned one...but i'm unstable like cain 2 abel, quick prayer 2
the Lord....
like a sharpened sword...i hear 'daddy'...tears drop from my sons
first words


......those words....'daddy'......was all i needed to pull me thru..
not only was it his first words....it was the first & only words i
needed 2 hear to maintain........



its like whoa....1
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Last edited by 13th Disciple : 09-19-03 at 02:51 PM.
 
Old 09-19-03, 10:41 PM   #5
Precise.
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Here we go. . short but sweet. If you don't get it refrain from voting. And bliizow.

I'm perched on a ledge of maddness and colored hues
With my skull cap tied backwards with the laces of my shoes
The notions of torture be-bopped against my skull fragments
Until I admit them in and enjoy my own loathing maddness
Cuz sometimes I lick the blade of my thoughts blindly
And kiss the speaker wires whenever they grow grimey
I dropped the sack of white ovals, the key to my hapiness
Zoloft and prozac bathed the floor of my pool of sess
The shards of a broken glass lay impedded in a nurses head
Her strained features remind me that she is dead
But sometimes in my head I repeat the scenes of death
And re-shove the jagged edges into her open wounded breast
I'm free now to kiss the devil and shake the hands of decay
I repeat 'kill' like the word layed within my brain at bay
My type-writter clicked another page another thought to hobble
Cuz these words, were the first words to my horror novel
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R.I.P.- Epimetheus
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Old 09-20-03, 08:37 PM   #6
-Magnitude
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Geez Fella's...

Im really lost for words on who to vote for, but I think I did come down to a decision - after reading both of your verse over and over again. Im gonna have to go with 13th on this because his vocabulary and imagery really had me, I didnt really catch on to Quo's imagery until the middle of his verse. I really thought this out and it was a great battle, but I really felt the imagery thinking of a kid saying 'Daddy' and saving his dad from Suicide. Quo, I did like your twist at the end but needed more to build into it.

Vote - 13th

- Saul Goode
 
Old 09-21-03, 01:39 PM   #7
NewPort
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SImple Breakdown..

Opener - 13th
On Topic - Both
Metas - Blah.. Not Much From Either
Wordplay - Quotient
Flow - 13th
Enjoyment - 13th
Depth - 13th
Creativity - Both
Finisher - 13th

Overall - 13th Disciple
Felt The Essence Of 13th's Verse

Return It
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...?threadid=
 
Old 09-21-03, 02:30 PM   #8
whitelightning
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Not a Bad Battle....here is the analysis

13th:
Good verse...really felt it..it was simple but grabbed..not many problems with it..lacked wordplay compared to Quotient but other than that it was solid.

Quotient:
Good concept and the imagery for this was really good. I just didn't get the feeling of it. It was a solid verse..Lacked vocab in a couple spots but nothing major.

VOTE: 13th
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Old 09-21-03, 05:27 PM   #9
Precise.
Therapist or The Rapist ?
 
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Fuck you kids. I posted this on UA and won 18-0. Fuuuckkk it. I drop out. I'm tired of losing just because people don't get shit. "I didn't get the imagery until the middle." Then don't vote you god damn moron. Not taking anything away from 13th. Nice showing dukes. But this is getting gay and out of hand. Blah. Don't put me in for next week tik. If you do I'll just no show. I'm leaving RB.

And before you fags come in going "Aw he's gonna leave cuz he lost." No. I'm leaving cuz there's maybe 8 people on this whole board who I respect and who knows a decent verse when it's down. I'll be around RB doing my mod job. But this I won't be dropping anything ever again. Pzzz.
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Old 09-21-03, 05:30 PM   #10
13th Disciple
i eat..eat..eat..emcees
 
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vote=Quo.....

better imagery.....wordplay.....and vocab.....nice grasp on the
topic....

13th....

eh.....seen better......vocab was weak.....also wordplay......didn't
really feel where u were going wit it.......

props to both
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