Dumb bitches pisses-me-off, three wishes her kisses-be-soft//

laid upon my lips as feathers to a pillow, tha girls just a nympho,so i sell kill-o//

grams, pam slams tha brand, injectin heroin and sand in her hands//

weighed down like liquid metal solidifying when it cools, one king has one nation in one land that he rules//

pride is taken faster than its earned, dont defy tha master and what youve learned//

for where you stand you will drop, and storms will rage and the sky will drop//

thats tha effect of me missin-you, my anger produces truth thats why im dissin-you//

discard pics of me kissin-you, and letters where i mention-you//

my intention-boo is too not remember, crisp-novembers wit miss-december, lost and forgot from tha snow of winter//

covered in a blanket, mix potion wit poison and drank-it, wrote this while smokin some dank-shit//

messages-subliminal question-is-general, do you smoke at a minimal or toke like a criminal//

choke like a seminole while puffin my peace-pipe, my piece-might get me some ass so im fuckin like grease-light//

we-like different forms of females, fine women formin minds-in-em',takes some time-wit-em' like three-hells//

who ever liked tha brainless-bitch, not me i like my stainless-shit,dont make me rain-this-clip//

i drained-this-spit leavin it huffin-and-weezin, touchin-his-breathin yall stop fuckin-wit-TreaZoN.

it was aight...
had that flow, and decent vocab...
it wasn't as good as some of your other ones thought...
I wasn't feelin the topic here too much... it wasn't bad though...

Oh yo, thanx for checking out my slept-on drop... lol...

Peace

i say it was coo...but you didnt really stay on ya topic...or come at it all that blunt or clear like you should have....you had bars in here that just drew away from ya whole theme duke...like thispride is taken faster than its earned, dont defy tha master and what youve learned//

for where you stand you will drop, and storms will rage and the sky will drop//

lol..i dont know what you were tryin to get at with that....but i dont see the relevance it has to dumb bitches...heh...maybe you can enlighten me...

keep elevatin nig...


igido

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freelance

RN Vs RB WAR!!....yr 2000...vet~~YEA I SAID VET!! WHAT YOU WANT ME TO PROVE IT? STEP THEN YOU FUCKING HOMO'S

It had flow, and really basic-internals but honestly, most of it seemed strung together with little thought behind it. If your gonna rhyme at all, at least try to make sense. I wasnt feeling this piece, sorry bro.

Elevate.

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W o r d P e r f e c t

well i guess it was a mixture of a key style and a topic related flow, the original i had typed was half done and my room mate closed tha website,my own dumb fault,but this is how it strung together as it got later and i rewrote it.jus lettin ya know thanks for tha replies. uppin

It was iight..
there was a lil forced rhyme scheme
and making up words just to rhyme = not good idea, unless your big pun but back to the topic.. it seems that you drifted a lil off course during the writing of it..
basically i have seen better drops from you..
just keep slanging and it will come back
sorry man


can u check out my piece "Fuck The Game, The Rest's The Same"

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