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[Wk2] Bribeone1 vs Ill Mental
IP: A9A7 727D
Verses Due: Thursday October 15th Voting Ends: Sunday October 18th Topic: Supply And Demand
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Life isn't a bitch... she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis |
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Guest
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IP: 3E31 455B
Im all up in this shit.....
Im all up in this shit..... Im all up in this shit..... Im all up in this shit..... Im all up in this shit..... Im all up in this shit..... Im all up in this shit..... Im all up in this shit..... |
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ShO-Nuff. Fuckers
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IP: C1DA C961
Someone Other than Cam...Hooray!!.
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MerK SquAd. <center><img src=http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=8889&stc=1></center> Last edited by K.Largo : 10-12-03 at 09:28 AM. |
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ShO-Nuff. Fuckers
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IP: 4577 CD9A
supply and demand..
year 2750 ...... poverties at an all time low, finally all crime has slowed. crumbles of what used to be, stories of what father time has told. year round cold has frozen the asthma of every plants' last breath. no more grains of regret and even jesus broke his last bread. forget abundance as weak arms drum to a slowly stunned dance. the last horn rang a war chant, what once fed us.. now we broke hand. like militant armed human viruses, ignoring cries that broke silences. machine torned down trees, even hatchets that swelled up calluses. Anaylisis of devastation was off , sad error in computing calculations. we were more into new gadgets then save our self innovations. blood drained from the veins, we vamped all natural oil. toxic waste congested the rains, the spouts nozzel was boiled. so no more drinking water, our last thirst had been quenched. at last it had avenged what gods' creative mind had arragend. now we fend for ourselves may the strongest willed survive. better off dead, life cut short....HOW?! when this is the longest thrill alive. abide by no rules our motto of greedyness applies to every man. too bad it shortened our supplies, for our hungry wrong demand.
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MerK SquAd. <center><img src=http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=8889&stc=1></center> |
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Guest
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IP: 31C1 CEE0
ok i have my verse... but i have to type it up, its on paper, so i will have it up after i get out of school...
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Guest
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IP: 31C1 CEE0
ok i got it typed up
I look up at the crescent moon, and sing myself a tune Reflect on my day, and all of my troubles float away Life is a play, and your only responsable for your part And usually we are all acting, more often than we arent From the start, I had known my part without being told My life had always been warm, but my heart grew cold I started to feel old, even though i was eighteen The world started to twist, shifting images I had seen I felt like a machine, someone else controlled my actions Life split into fractions, couldnt stay away from the distractions I wonder how this happens, how do we lose individuality Live's steered away from reality, not allowed a personality Givin a certain mentality, but they lack originality Thats why there could never be a thing such as immortality You could never live forever, if you did who would care There would already be someone else just like you sitting there Everyone is a clone, and even though theres a million everyones There are still millions who are all clones off of the original some one And this cant be undone, people only accept what they believe They are kept naive, this way new ideas wont be concieved As for me, i found a way to destroy the mold Lo and behold, as the real world starts to unfold Do away with the blindofld, open your eyes to see the birth Not of a new-born child, but of the new emerging earth There... i have supplied you the knowledge, You just have to demand yourself to read it, And allow yourself to break the mold and be an individual. This world is no matrix, it is just a normal world... Filled with brainwashed clones. Last edited by Mental God : 10-19-03 at 04:43 PM. |
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Guest
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IP: 399E F0FD
I had a hard time catching Bribe's flow. I think there were instances of secondary rhymes interupting primary rhymes, throwing me off. However he supplied good imagery in an execution that demands it. He also did well with the topic, writing a verse around it. This is where Ill-Mental loses big. It would be hard for me to vote for a verse which I believe completely tacks on the notion of the topic at the end, in a prose closing. How tricky and clever... It was a pretty good verse too. Too bad, recycle it for another topic and see how you do.
Vote-Bribeone1 |
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IP: A9A7 727D
oh
well this was actually a pretty good battle bribeone-your verse hurt my head, but it was the kind of hurt a dominatrix administers. I Loved the pain =). Your multies were dope, and you still managed to tell a bit of a story without having any real characters. You are really good at flipping topics. Great Verse Man. Ill Mental- Your verse was too simple. The beginning was nice, but it seemed that you changed your whole verse in the middle into being something it wasn't. It seemed like a fairly innocent piece and then you busted out this ground breaking information that didn't make very much sense at all. I suppose that's because we're kept naive, right? =) vote-Bribeone1
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Life isn't a bitch... she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis |
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IP: A9A7 727D
Bribe wins.
[closed]
__________________
Life isn't a bitch... she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis |
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