ive been hated on, debated wrong, for my chance to stop the grind and shine i waited long,
my mind i made it strong, so i can claim my name back to the throne, where it belong
these are my schemes and formality, made it real no more dreams its reality
disciple turned profit nationality,
keep the street in my memo, ignor niggas like produces who sleep on a demo, innocent girl in heat turned to a bim~bo
I will not face defeat and its that sim~ple
we got these mufacus who nosy, these fakes and snakes that try to expose me,
enclose me, but they cant cause Gods the one who chose me, like a game of freeze tag he unfroze me
his preacher, his main feature, hated by many but respected like students with they teacher,
or like mother nature with her creature
i came in unexpectivally but God is the one directing me, so how could yall begin dissecting me, and when i leave the next man is going to take ova respectively

that was ok homie.......ur flow seemed to fall off, to help improve that, ima say try and even out ur lines, ur vocab and wordplay was pretty good, next time ima say try and pick a different topic, but u have potential kid......keep droppin.......

peace.......

yeah^^werdness.... that was okay the flow fell off at tiems but overall it was pretyt good

yeah this shit was aight keep droppin...
7/10

I agree wit these homies, pretty good but again even out da lines it doesnt quite sound right....... work on ya structure....
keep spittin practice makes perfect............... aight... PEACE!!!!

mainly you need to input a more consistent structure, that will not only make it look better and keep you within a kinda syallable line length limit, but it will help your flow

the vocab, wordplay and multis were all of a next level compared to this (above), so if you hit another verse with that same kind, but with a structure and better flow, you should elevate....

O and also, try not to force multis, you don't hav to always have them, try and only include those that are killers, and drop out the weaker ones....nice drop tho.....keep doin it