I have the memory of different scents
Being consumed in dozens of wombs
playing Russian roulette, first prize a cozy tomb
Some I would just lay with, laugh with
Some I thought I could take that eternal path wit
Some were like mathematics
Take the good with the bad and subtract it
Potential--well, some lack it
And I'm sure to some I did the same
We all smiled upside down--playing the game
Wishing inside this person meant more
Some had me like Large Pro
"Looking at the front door..."
An emotional war
In the end death is desensitization
In the end there's nothing left
But good friends and long conversations
I abstained once
wasn't fond of masturbation
But I felt like I had to clean out my soul
Make room in my fox hole
One in the hand
Is better than two in the bush
I've been told
I've held gold
And the next tainted coin that passed
To the highest bidder it was sold
I let go
Scare to hold
Scare of being alone--when I'm old
Scare to death of falling in love, 10 fold
So like subdivision I stand beside my self
And asked me
What is it you really want?
I ignored my questions
And continue the hunt
Dick getting sucked dry, fuck used cunts
Laid all night
Remy Red and freshly rolled blunts
I bump into an ex
Who propositioned me to swing an ep
I looked at shorty, said nice to see you, Stay up
then I stepped
I remember once I would have took her up on her proposition
Lay her out wet, breast covered in hot body oil glistening
Exploring orifices with taste, touch, smell and vision
Karma Sutra, Fung Shia, compromising positions
listen...
I have revamped my motive of operandi
updated my mission
I've grown a little older
I've gained some valuable wisdom
I often sit in the dark
Remember ends, where they start then stopped
I feel God inside of me now
I suppose its time to play the part