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View Poll Results: Who won this battle?
@. 2 28.57%
*Troop* 5 71.43%
Voters: 7. You may not vote on this poll

 
 
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Old 02-22-05, 01:54 PM   #30
DQ
Odi et Amo
 
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Posts: 3,675
From: Alosta City
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Voted For: *Troop*

T.R.OO.P: topic is hard to use some creativity with because it's very precise so won't be an aspect in this battle. Like how you told the story from beginning to ending and how it progressed. Emotion was raw, painted a good picture inside my head and kept it real. Was feeling your flow, length of your sentences was good as well as your structure. Found good balance with your vocab and some nice imagery here and there.

On the Subject of Finding a Cure for this here... H-I-V
Banned by my Community and Now hate--Is--all- I-C
^liking these lines


@.: don't really know what happened before this, felt you could've given some more details considering how he got aids and such. Emotion was good,vocab was quite simple yet nice and structure was cool. Had your flow on lock but I felt like you could've gone bit more indepth with some things, you focussed on the medical side of it. Wanted to read more about the struggle the person had to through every day because you had real nice emotion here and there but it faded away too quick...good drop though!

Why do I have to have it liek this...im over it
But I guess I gotta live life and make the most of it
^last lines are the best
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