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Old 10-23-05, 09:13 PM   #16
Mentor
a.k.a prozak
 
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Posts: 2,177
From: your walkman
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okay QueerBag oh i mean Gladbag haha (lol dont take it personally im just havin fun)
ur lyrics is defitnly up there but i think u got so caught up wit tryin ta get some ill multies that ur shit started ta not make any sense...kinda just focus on what message ur tryin ta get out to the public and start tellin it and ur multis kinda come automaticully and then it'll be more impressive cuz ur spittin wordz that fit wit each other and is speakin on the same thang so kinda try ta provoke urself from forcin ur rhymes...ur punchlines were so-so some of them were dope and others were corny as hell...but you'll improve if u keep on tryin...structure was ight, not perfect but not to the point where it was horrible niether so u did so-so on that too...so u get a 6.5/10 keep on elevatin youngsta....yo now RTF on my o.m..its called "Our Society"
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=212478
go peep that shit and leave feedback and i'll appreciate it...thanx lotz youngsta
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