And I'm like "what the fuck??... Has someone been kidnapped?!... Well I'm not opening it......it's probably filled with anthrax."

But then i did open it. cause im a man. And guess what.

Poetry.com sent me a letter saying they want to publish one of my pieces with a writer bio set to come out in fall 2006, called "immortal verses". the original piece i submitted to them was too long so they only used the 3rd and 4th verses, but i'm now eligible to earn between $1000 - $10000

Sweet.

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Was he robbed of the ashphalt that cushioned his face?