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IP:
Although I don't really feel this collab was necessarilly slept on I DO think you got quite a bit of shitty replies... I'll throw mine in the mix though...
Here is a line from Sinikal I was really feelin b/c it's so damn true... looking out the window seeing 9 year olds dressed in skirts above their knees/what the fucks this world coming to? Here is a line from Omega that stuck out... i wish i could take ma life n re-mould if the truths told the Truth hurts n to darkness i'm so addicted whoever thought ma life could b written in a thousand words or drawn in a picture but i dont wanna b a fixture thats why i write these skriptures n come equipped wit lyrix to add to the mixture ^I have no clue where your lines began and ended so I picked up a lot extra but I liked the thousand words and a picture thing you had going on... Here is what ya need to do though... In Omega's case... don't write in paragraph form, instead add a "/" at the end of every line such as Sinikal did but hit enter after the "/" so we'll read it easier. I also just told Sinikil was she needed to do right there... Hit enter. That's about all I saw wrong with this piece is was hot as hell but it would have been MUCH better on Omega's part if I could catch onto his flow but I didn't know where to put and emphasis. Good collab guys. pz |
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